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Meet 2 couples sharing their lives and a love of sports

Rowing, swimming offer friendly competition and a common bond

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same-sex couples, gay news, Washington Blade

On left, Sheila and Gretchen Oā€™Sullivan are members of the DC Strokes Rowing Club. On right, Fred Dever and Eric Czander met on the DC Aquatics team. (Photos courtesy of the couples)

Many of the LGBT sports teams in D.C. count same-sex couples as members of their clubs. Some joined the team together and others became a couple after first being teammates.

Meet two LGBT couples who have woven sports into the lives they are sharing. Not only are they benefitting their own health and well-being, they are sharing it with their partner.

Sheila Oā€™Sullivan grew up in Novi, Mich., where soccer was her sport of choice. She attended high school in England and added rowing as her spring sport.

Back in the States, she graduated from the Coast Guard Academy in Connecticut in 2000. She coached rowing on Sammamish Lake in Washington before heading to grad school at Carnegie Mellon University.

Canonsburg, Pa. was home to Gretchen Oā€™Sullivan where she played softball and tennis in high school. She attended Allegheny College and was a member of the orchestra. A stint with AmeriCorps was followed by grad school at Carnegie Mellon.

The pair became a couple after meeting at grad school in Pittsburgh. Sheila would graduate first in 2007 and leave to work with the Peace Corps before moving to D.C. in 2009 where she joined the club program of the DC Strokes Rowing Club.

ā€œAfter she left I joined the learn to row program with Three Rivers Rowing in Pittsburgh,ā€ says Gretchen. ā€œIt was all because of Sheila. I never would have thought of rowing otherwise.ā€

Gretchen came to D.C. the following year and started with the DC Strokes novice program. She eventually joined Sheila in the club program and they often ended up in the same boat.

ā€œShe would get frustrated with me, but the overall experience was great,ā€ says Sheila. ā€œItā€™s great being outside and working as a team. We met our core group of friends with the Strokes and even if we are not rowing, they remain in our lives.ā€

ā€œShe was only trying to help me when we were in a boat together, but it was sometimes stressful,ā€ Gretchen says. ā€œOtherwise it was wonderful and there was great energy. Our drives back and forth to practice were always fun.ā€

Life started getting in the way for the pair and they began swapping rowing seasons to be supportive of who had the time to row. There was work, a new puppy, a new house, and they got married in the spring of 2013.

Both were competing in regattas ā€“ Sheila moved up to the competitive program and rowed at Stonewall, Charm City Sprints and the Head of the Hooch in Tennessee; Gretchen at the 2014 Gay Games in Cleveland where she won medals of each color.

Gretchen was trying to get pregnant in 2015 which meant that it was Sheilaā€™s turn to row again. Their baby was born in late 2016 and Sheila started training for a new job with the Park Police. Gretchen is working as a site coordinator with a national nonprofit. Both are currently not rowing but are itching to get back in the boat.

ā€œI really wanted to stay involved, so I am serving on the DC Strokes board as secretary,ā€ says Gretchen. ā€œRowing is really for everyone and you can adapt it to your own needs. I would love for her to row again and I also see it for myself on the horizon.ā€

ā€œI love that it is something you can come back to at any age and I am inspired by rowers that are older,ā€ Sheila says. ā€œRowing is a passion of mine and it will be a lifetime sport for me.ā€

Syracuse, N.Y. native Fred Dever grew up competing in swimming and water polo through high school. He was an NCAA Division I swimmer at Marist College for four years and captained in his final year. On the side, he lifeguarded and coached swimming and water polo.

His work in pharmaceutical sales brought him to D.C. in 1995 and he was reluctant to join DC Aquatics Club because he didnā€™t think a gay team would be serious.

ā€œI joined the team in 2002 and it was great getting back into organized workouts and making new friends,ā€ says Fred. ā€œItā€™s super rewarding, competitive, and everything you can wish for as a gay athlete.ā€

Eric Czander started swimming year around at age nine while growing up in Westfield, N.J. He swam for four years as an NCAA Division I athlete at Vanderbilt University. His education continued at Rutgers New Jersey Medical School and Emory University School of Medicine for his Neurology residency.

He signed on for five years in the Navy hoping that the military lifestyle would prevent him from coming out. Before his duty began, he joined masters swimming and helped form a gay team in Atlanta where he came out in 1993. His last two years in the military brought him to D.C. where he joined DC Aquatics in 1998.

Fred and Eric met on the team and have spent the last 16 years sharing their lives with a healthy dose of swimming, triathlons and running.

ā€œIt helps with motivation to have someone to go to practice with and just having someone by your side,ā€ says Eric. ā€œItā€™s nice to be able to bounce things off each other. We are each otherā€™s biggest motivator and biggest critic.ā€

ā€œI like the way it feels having sports in our lives,ā€ Fred says. ā€œI would be a slacker if it wasnā€™t for Eric. He is much more driven than I am.ā€

Fred and Eric are the same age and compete in the same age group in swimming, though not in the same events. They are also of the same ability and purposefully donā€™t train in the same lane at practice.

ā€œThere is a little competitiveness in practice even though we donā€™t swim the same events,ā€ Eric says. ā€œNever harmful though, always healthy. Both of us have grown and learned from each other.ā€

ā€œSometimes I just want my own space, so I can be silly with our other teammates,ā€ adds Fred.

In addition to competitive swimming, Fred and Eric have also completed running marathons and triathlons together. Eric had been competing in them for years before meeting Fred and brought him into the sports.

ā€œMy first marathon in D.C. was cancelled and Eric pushed me to run the St. Louis Marathon,ā€ says Fred. ā€œWe always make sure the other one is safe in our races. Someone died in a recent open water race we were in and I ended up in the medical tent at the Boston Marathon. Each race starts with ā€œI love you, be safe.ā€ā€™

ā€œWhen he started doing road running and triathlons, I was beating him at first and then he started beating me,ā€ says Eric. ā€œWe try not to race next to each other, but our times are very similar. Itā€™s good motivation.ā€

Coming up for the pair is a trip to Paris for Gay Games X in August where they both will be swimming eight events in the pool.

ā€œSwimming is all about family and connections,ā€ Fred says. ā€œOur DC Aquatics teammates are our family.ā€

ā€œItā€™s awesome to explore new cities and cultures together,ā€ Eric says. ā€œPlus, I canā€™t wait for Fred to butcher the French language.ā€

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Caitlyn Jenner backs NY county transgender athletes ban

‘Letā€™s stop it now while we can’

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Caitlyn Jenner endorses Nassau County's transgender athlete ban during a press conference. (YouTube screenshot)

Caitlyn Jenner flew from Malibu to New York this week to join her fellow Republicans in their nationwide quest to keep transgender girls and women from competing in sports with other women. 

ā€œLetā€™s stop it now while we can,ā€ said the Olympic gold medalist, at a news conference carried live by Fox News Channel. 

Republican Nassau County Executive Bruce Blakeman organized the event so that Jenner could speak in support of his February executive order banning trans athletes at more than 100 county-owned facilities. 

ā€œTrans women are competing against women, taking valuable opportunities for the long-protected class under Title IX and causing physical harm,ā€ said Jenner without providing supportive evidence of her claim. Jenner said the ban would defeat ā€œthe woke agenda.ā€ 

Her comments drew praise from former NCAA swimmer and paid shill Riley Gaines, who represents the Independent Womenā€™s Forum and has also worked with the failed presidential campaign of Republican Gov. Ron DeSantis of Florida on his anti-trans athlete platform.

ā€œIf the left wants to fight this battle on this hill, itā€™s a losing battle,ā€ said Jenner. ā€œWe will win the battle.ā€ She claimed she spoke on behalf of women and girls, contradicting her past statements in support of trans girls competing according to their gender identity and despite the fact she herself still competes in womenā€™s sports.

Shortly after the ban was announced last month, New York State Attorney General Letitia James and New York Gov. Kathy Hochul, both Democrats, denounced it and accused Blakeman of ā€œbullying trans kids.ā€ 

James called the order ā€œtransphobic and deeply dangerous,ā€ and argued that it violates the stateā€™s anti-discrimination laws. The state attorney general challenged it in court March 1 with a ā€œcease and desist letter,ā€ demanding that Blakeman rescind the order, saying it subjects womenā€™s and girlsā€™ sports teams to ā€œinvasive questioning.ā€

As the Los Angeles Blade reported, Blakeman’s legal team countered with its own lawsuit on March 5, claiming her cease and desist letter violates the 14th Amendmentā€™s equal protection clause.

ā€œNot only was the executive order legal, but we had an obligation to defend it,ā€ Blakeman said Monday. 

The order has also been challenged by the New York Civil Liberties Union, which filed suit last week on behalf of a womenā€™s roller derby league based in Nassau County that welcomes trans women and would be barred from using the countyā€™s facilities by Blakemanā€™s executive order.

Just days before the Long Island news conference, Jenner joined Olympian Sharron Davies, who also campaigns against trans inclusion in sports, for an conversation with a British newspaper, the Telegraph, which has been outspoken against trans inclusion.Ā 

They recalled that in their day, tests to determine sex were mandatory in order to compete, and Jenner said she has been ā€œpushingā€ for sex tests to return to sports, decades after sports organizations around the world abandoned the practice because they were unreliable. ā€œIf they continue down this road, it will be pretty much the end of womenā€™s sport as we know it.ā€

ā€œI can still hit a golf ball 280 yards,ā€ Jenner continued, not mentioning she plays from the ladiesā€™ tee. She did however opine about not being ā€œa real woman,ā€ acknowledging that many trans women disagree with her view. 

ā€œThey keep saying, ā€˜Oh, Iā€™m a real woman, Iā€™m a real woman,ā€™ and Iā€™m going, ā€˜No, youā€™re not,ā€™ā€ said Jenner. ā€œI will use your preferred pronouns, I will treat you as a female, you can run and dress and do whatever you want, I have nothing against that, itā€™s fine, but biologically youā€™re still male.ā€

She added: ā€œā€‹Let me explain ā€” I am biologically male, OK? Iā€™m XY. Thereā€™s nothing I can do to change that. If you believe in gender dysphoria, and I think most people do realize itā€™s not a disease, itā€™s a mental condition, just like some people are left-handed and some people are right-handed, itā€™s kind of the way youā€™re born and Iā€™ve dealt with it my entire life.ā€œ

ā€œI consider myself a trans person, I am still genetically male, I changed all of my ID right down to my birth certificate so technically yes, I am female, but on the other hand I know Iā€™m not.ā€

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Former UMD basketball player Abby Meyers discusses lesbians in sports, March Madness

Potomac native signed with the London Lions last August

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Abby Meyers (Photo courtesy of Abby Meyers)

Star basketball player Abby Meyers signed with the London Lions last August, but she called Maryland home before calling the shots in London.

Meyers, a lesbian shooting guard, grew up in Potomac and graduated from Walt Whitman High School in 2017. She played for Princeton in her undergraduate years and played for the University of Maryland during graduate school.

She began playing basketball in elementary school, and she was already showing an abundance of potential by the time she was in high school.

In her freshman year of high school, the schoolā€™s basketball coach sat down with Meyers and her family and showed them a list of universities with Division I basketball teams. Meyers circled the names of the schools that she was interested in attending. From there, the doors leading to a collegiate basketball career began to open. She began working towards her dream and ended up playing for Princeton.

ā€œIt was kind of like a mutual understanding between the two of us, me and basketball,ā€ Meyers told the Washington Blade. ā€œI took more individual lessons, and I just realized that the potential was sky high.ā€

She came back to her home state to attend the University of Maryland not only for its business program but also for its celebrated basketball team.

ā€œI grew up watching Alyssa Thomas, Shatori Walker-Kimbrough and so many other legends that passed through that program,ā€ Meyers said. ā€œSo for me, I knew that basketball-wise, it was the best decision I could make. ā€¦ They definitely had all of the qualities to make me the best player I could be.ā€

Before shipping off to London, Meyers briefly played in the WNBA for the Washington Mystics in the summer of 2023. In fact, the aforementioned UMD alum Shatori Walker-Kimbrough was one of her teammates.

She described her time with the WNBA and in London so far as a ā€œlearning experience.ā€ 

ā€œI got to relearn what it meant to be a rookie again,ā€ Meyers said. ā€œAll of a sudden you enter a new team, a new level and you’re at the bottom, and you just have to let your actions speak louder than your words.ā€

Meyers publicly came out around 2019, and since then she has been a role model for many other lesbian women in sports.

ā€œBy coming out I’m actually being my authentic self, but I was scared that people were going to judge me and look at me differently when in fact, I was met with open arms, love, and appreciation,ā€ Meyers said.

Meyers believes the journey one takes to coming out is an individual process that looks different for everyone.

ā€œAt the end of the day, it’s your own race; run it at your own pace,ā€ Meyers said.  ā€œNever be apologetic for who you are. When you have to start compromising yourself and your values for other people like though thatā€™s not the community you want to be a part of.ā€

She has not experienced much anti-LGBTQ stigma since coming out, but that does not mean that it does not exist in other sports communities. However, in this modern social climate, Meyers pointed out, people are much more accepting of gay women in sports.

Nina Hazra, a University of Maryland medical student, grew up playing basketball with Meyers. The two were on the same team in middle school, but they went to different high schools and would often play against each other. 

Hazra did not play much past high school, but she remained close friends with her former teammate and rival to this day. She went to most of the home games during Meyersā€™ stint at UMD.

Though Hazra does not identify with the LGBTQ community, she noticed a tension in the sports world that affects all women, regardless of sexuality. However, with todayā€™s shifting climate, it has become easier for female athletes to express their identities

ā€œWomen who express strong emotions in sports are often treated differently than men who do the exact same thing,ā€ Hazra said in an interview. ā€œI feel like as we’ve gotten older, there’s been a lot more celebration of womanhood in whatever form in sports, and I think that’s one of the places where you can then kind of go outside those societal norms.ā€

But Hazra still noticed the impact Meyers had on younger generations in sports who may be struggling with their identities.

ā€œIt doesn’t matter your sexuality, your gender identity, all that stuff. That doesn’t matter when you’re playing a sport,ā€ Hazra said. ā€œA lot of us didn’t have role models in those years growing up and just to get to see her being that for so many girls is so amazing.ā€

Elisa Pinzan, also a former Terrapin, is good friends with Meyers. 

Originally from Italy, Pinzan played for the University of South Florida for four years before entering the transfer portal and landing at UMD. She now plays for Keflavik IF in Iceland.

Pinzan and Meyers formed a strong bond while playing for the Terrapins together. 

ā€œShe was the first person I got close to; she is very open, smiley and friendly, and I felt comfortable around her from the first day,ā€ Pinzan described. ā€œI am glad to have met someone like Abby, with such a kind soul.ā€

Pinzan thought that fans should keep their eyes peeled for the Terrapins this upcoming March Madness season. 

ā€œThey are a very young team with energy, enthusiasm and grit on the floor, and I think they are a lot better than the record they have,ā€ Pinzan wrote about the Terrapins in an interview. ā€œDespite being young though, they are learning a lot every game and I am sure they will be able to transfer these lessons for the best time of the year coming up.ā€

Meyers agreed that there is a lot to look forward to this March Madness. She said that with Coach Brenda Freseā€™s game plans and strong assistant staff, the Terrapins have a strong chance of advancing throughout the competition.

According to Meyers, March Madness will be different for womenā€™s basketball this year, pointing out that itā€™s more popular right now than menā€™s games, as womenā€™s basketball is selling out arenas.

ā€œI only think it’s gonna get better and it’s going to grow even more,ā€ Meyers said. ā€œJust the marketing, the social media, the overall awareness of the women’s game. Fans are growing by the number.ā€

Meyers believes that female basketball players have to rely more on their skill than their athleticism, which she believes makes womenā€™s games just as ā€” if not more ā€” exciting than menā€™s games. She said that over the past few years, there has been a strong shift in womenā€™s viewership that has shrunk the gap between menā€™s and womenā€™s basketball, including from a technical standpoint, given that men and women play with the same level of equipment.

Regardless of where UMD ends up this March Madness, Meyers will be cheering the Terrapins on from across the pond ā€” especially the women.

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Banned trans golfer Hailey Davidson: ā€˜Hate and bigotry will never win’

NXXT mandates players must be ā€˜biological female at birthā€™

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Hailey Davidson on Good Morning Britain. (Good Morning Britain YouTube screenshot)

Transgender pro golfer Hailey Davidson is pushing back against a policy change announced Friday by the Florida-based mini-tour, NXXT. From now on, competitors must be ā€œa biological female at birthā€ in order to participate. 

ā€œEffective immediately, I have been removed (banned) from the next three NXXT tournaments that I had already signed up for and been approved to play,ā€ said Davidson in a post on Instagram. ā€œThey changed their policy mid season, after signing me up already and being 2nd in the Player of the Year race.ā€Ā 

The three-time winner from Scotland has played nine times on the tour this season.

According to a statement by the tourā€™s CEO, Stuart McKinnon, the change underscores the organizationā€™s commitment to ā€œmaintaining the integrity of womenā€™s professional golf and ensuring fair competition.ā€ NXXT Golf issued that statement on International Womenā€™s Day.

ā€œAs we navigate through the evolving landscape of sports, it is crucial to uphold the competitive integrity that is the cornerstone of womenā€™s sports,ā€ said McKinnon in the statement. ā€œOur revised policy is a reflection of our unwavering commitment to celebrating and protecting the achievements and opportunities of female athletes. Protected categories are a fundamental aspect of sports at all levels and it is essential for our Tour to uphold these categories for biological females, ensuring a level playing field.ā€

Davidson said the policy change in her social media post was discrimination, adding that the decision denigrates cisgender female athletes as well as trans athletes. 

ā€œYou know what really bugs me is that people think I win just by showing up,ā€ she wrote. ā€œThis is such a slap in the face to ALL female athletes being told that any male can transition and beat them regardless of the life of hard work those women put in.

ā€œYou think youā€™re attacking me, but youā€™re actually attacking and putting down ALL other female athletes.ā€

She concluded with a vow: ā€œYou can scream at me, threaten me, throw insults at me, and even ban me BUT I will ALWAYS get back up and keep fighting to the very end. Hate and bigotry will never win.ā€

Davidson also posted a message for the women she had planned to compete against: ā€œI hope those NXXT players who are now in the top five are still able to earn those Epson Tour exemptions they were promised and continue to be reminded of in the previous couple of tournaments.ā€ 

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