Movies
Documenting despair
Gay filmmakers ponder AIDS, homophobia in sobering new features

Local gay filmmakers Joe Wilson and Dean Hamer at their Shaw home. Their 2009 documentary 'Out in the Silenceā is being screened in New York Monday and has local PBS broadcasts scheduled for this month. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Veteran documentary filmmaker Susan Koch, a straight woman who grew up in Bethesda, Md., knew her new film “The Other City” wasn’t destined to be the feel-good hit of the year. The former journalist, however, says it “tells a story that needs to be told.”
An exploration of the dichotomy between the powerful and impoverished extremes of the District and how those extremes factor into the local AIDS crisis, Koch says “City” was never conceived as a project with high commercial appeal.
“It’s like, ‘Hey, wanna go check out this film on AIDS?,'” Koch says in a faux sing-songy voice during a phone interview. “But that’s not the reason you make films, especially documentaries. You make them because you want to shed a light on things that have been in the dark for too long.”
“City” is one of two gay-themed documentaries with upcoming screenings that have a D.C. connection. It will be shown Tuesday at the Newseum then later next week at Silverdocs, a local documentary film festival (silverdocs.com). A new cut of the 2009 film “Out in the Silence,” made by local gay filmmakers Joe Wilson and Dean Hamer, will be screened in New York Monday and broadcast on Maryland Public Television Wednesday night at 10:30 with a rebroadcast at 2:30 a.m. Thursday morning. A June 29 broadcast is slated for local PBS affiliate WETA at 10 p.m. (visit http://wpsu.org/outinthesilence/ and theothercity.com for more information).
Wilson and Hamer, who wed in Canada in 2004, felt similarly about their story, which started when they submitted a wedding announcement to the Derrick, a newspaper in Wilson’s hometown of Oil City, Pa. The paper ran the announcement without hesitation but its publication ignited a firestorm of controversy that played out for months in letters to the editor. In desperation, Oil City resident Kathy Springer, whose gay son CJ was being harassed daily in school, tracked down Wilson in Washington and begged for help. She was at wit’s end and found hope in the marriage announcement.
“She doesn’t use computers or any modern technology so we got this 17-page handwritten letter,” Wilson says. “She was a mother who felt helpless and didn’t know where else to turn. I guess she saw [our announcement] as a lifeline.”
Wilson says receiving her letter was “emotional” and “profound.”
“We knew we had to go meet them,” he says.
Hamer, a scientist, and Wilson, a human rights activist, decided to film their visit. They’d dabbled in short films, but had never shot a feature. Wilson says he was inspired by a desire to play a positive role in his hometown community where it wasn’t acceptable to be openly gay. They ended up filming nearly 300 hours of footage on weekend trips to Oil City over a three-year period.
“There are stories like this going on all over the place,” Wilson says. “But they just aren’t seen or little attention is paid to them, particularly in our own movement. The will or the capacity or the resources of our own movement just doesn’t direct attention in the way it should to these areas so we tried to shine a light that we felt was needed.”
Needed for what?
“The thing is, everywhere you go there are tons of gay people,” Hamer says. “That’s what the title really refers to. Their friends might know or other people might know but it’s very rarely talked about. It’s considered offensive or worrisome, but there really is this subterranean gay activity that’s never fully acknowledged. It’s just hard for LGBT folks there to identify allies and have their voices heard.”
The movie was released last year, shown on PBS and at Reel Affirmations, D.C.’s gay film fest. But it’s had a second life of sorts. A Sundance grant enabled the filmmakers to add 10 minutes to “Silence’s” running time. They’re working with the ACLU and PFLAG to have the film screened in small towns around the country including all 67 counties in Pennsylvania.
“We call libraries, we have a community educational program, we run articles in the local newspapers, invite people from across the community to engage in dialogue,” Wilson says. “We’ve lived in an urban area for the last 20 or 30 years so we’ve become more aligned with the establishment, you know, advocacy thinking in urban America and we’re largely in agreement with what those goals are, there are important legislative goals and so on. But what we’ve found is that those demands that exist on that level don’t necessarily line up with real people’s lives in small areas. They have a lot of other, very different needs.”
The impetus for Koch’s film was much different. She found inspiration in a series of 2006 articles by gay journalist Jose Antonio Vargas, who was hired by the Washington Post fresh out of college in 2004. He’d been shocked at the cultural gulf between prominent lawmakers and lobbyists and poverty-stricken, disenfranchised D.C. residents and how that gulf played out in the city’s AIDS crisis.
“When people think Washington, D.C., all they know is the official Washington, D.C.,” Vargas says. “I was exploring this whole other D.C., where, of course, there’s a huge gay population. I mean I lived in the Castro in San Francisco and sometimes I honestly think D.C. is gayer. More button-downed gay, but still very gay. So you have this Capitol Hill mindset, this gay culture, which I found really fascinating, and all these incredibly bright and accomplished and educated gay people and then a really growing Hispanic population and then you realize that D.C. is predominantly black. I didn’t know what chocolate city was. So you take the bus from U Street right into Anacostia and it’s like this squatter area or something within just a few miles of the White House. So for me I was really telling the story of the other D.C., which was my way of telling how HIV and AIDS spread in D.C.”
Koch vaguely remembers seeing one of Vargas’s Post articles but didn’t realize it was part of a series until later. She’d finished her last film “Kicking It,” about homeless soccer leagues around the world, and was reading old Post articles online cruising for inspiration.
“I was like, ‘Wow, I didn’t know about this,'” Koch says of D.C.’s 3 percent HIV infection rate. “The fact that we have these kinds of rates really troubled me. It seemed like kind of a well-kept secret. I would talk to people I knew and they always act stunned. Even though he’s done this groundbreaking series, it didn’t seem to register.”
Koch and Vargas collaborated on the film shooting for about 10 months in 2009. Many of the subjects had been quoted in Vargas’s story but not all. The film features Ron Daniels, a straight former drug addict who runs a needle exchange van; J’Mia Edwards, a straight single mother who got AIDS from a former boyfriend; Jose Ramirez, a gay Latino teen who got infected from his older boyfriend who eventually died; and Jimmy, a 35-year-old white gay man who died of AIDS during shooting.
“We were with him from the moment he came into [care site] Joseph’s House until he was taken out in a body bag,” Koch says. “He’d been on lots of different treatments and just got resistant and his body couldn’t handle it. That’s a point that’s really important ā gay men are still dying of AIDS in 2010 and I don’t think that’s acceptable.”
“The Other City” premiered at the Tribeca Film Festival in April.
“I really hope everyone sees this,” Vargas says. “Most people probably don’t get a chance to see the fullness of the city very often.”
Movies
An āIndian Boyā challenges family tradition in sweet romcom
Refreshing look at what is possible when a family is willing to make changes

For queer audiences hungry for representation, nothing says āI feel seenā quite as much as a good queer romcom.
Perhaps itās because love stories are universal, differing from culture to culture in the surface details only, and therefore have the potential for helping straight audiences understand a different kind of love a little better; or perhaps, in seeing our kind of love displayed so publicly, we feel a sense of validation. Whatever the reason, it rings our bell.
Maybe thatās why the quest for the first āgreat gay romcomā has continued to be a driving factor in the ongoing history of queer cinema, setting up an expectation in the mainstream that has, perhaps inevitably, fallen short of creating it. Fortunately, there are some efforts that have risen above the pressure to simply be what they are, instead of being the answer to everybodyās prayers for acceptance, and in so doing have managed to come close.
āA Nice Indian Boyā is just that kind of movie. Adapted from a play by Madhuri Sheka (by Eric Randall, whose screenplay made Hollywoodās buzzy āBlack Listā of un-produced scripts in 2021) and directed by Canadian-born Indian filmmaker Roshan Sethi, it might come closer to presenting an entirely successful gay romcom than most of the other overthought efforts that have come before.
It centers on Naveen (Karan Soni), a 30-something gay doctor, whose South Asian Indian family has long since accepted and supported his orientation but still struggles to reconcile it with their traditional beliefs. Enter Jay (Jonathan Groff), a white freelance photographer who grew up as an adoptee to Indian parents, and of course itās love at first sight. A whirlwind courtship leads to a proposal, but there are a lot of considerations that must be met before the smitten couple can achieve the ābig Indian weddingā of their dreams. The one that looms largest is gaining the approval of Naveenās progressive-but-devout Hindu parents (Harish Patel and Zarna Garg) ā not to mention his discontented sister (Sunita Mani) ā whose confusion over his new fiancĆ©ās ethnicity is just one of many obstacles they face in making their dream nuptials a reality. Intensifying that challenge ā frequently to comedic effect āĀ is Naveenās struggle with his own insecurities, which threaten to derail not only the wedding plans but his relationship with the emotionally open and unreservedly passionate Jay, too.
Itās a sweet and clearly heartfelt affair, with a few laugh-out-loud moments to be found, as well as the wry introspection of its neurotic lead character, whose self-questioning turmoils feel like a connecting thread to the work of Woody Allen ā indeed, āAnnie Hallā is even name-dropped in the film, suggesting a spirit of homage that can be traced in a reflection of that classic Oscar-winnerās title character through Jayās quirkily unconventional personality.
At the same time, the movie marries its diverse cultural influences by drawing just as heavily from a love of āBollywoodā cinema, and one of its movies in particular, which both of its protagonists adore. That allows it to maintain an aura of lush, larger-than-life romanticism that counterpoints the amusingly endearing self-deprecation of its main protagonist; it also reflects in the movieās colorful, lively visual aesthetic and its choice to share focus on an entire family of characters for a more sweeping perspective.
As for its handling of the subject of race, despite its clear (and queer) twist on the āGuess Whoās Coming to Dinner?ā trope of a familyās surprise over a bi-ethnic romance in its midst, āIndian Boyā doesnāt spend much time worrying about a love connection shared across racial divides; and while it gets considerable comic mileage out of Naveenās parentsā well-intentioned but clueless efforts to show their acceptance of their gay son, the queerness of his relationship is not really an issue in itself. Rather, the conflict comes ā for all of the movieās primary characters, not just for the couple in the middle ā from the difficulty of finding harmony between old customs and a new world that no longer fits within their boundaries.
Admittedly, Sethiās movie sometimes feels a little too sentimental to be believed; it paints an aspirational picture ā a true-love romance between a successful doctor and a rising artist ā and tugs even harder on our heartstrings with its depictions of clumsy-but-sincere acceptance from the family around them; and while we donāt want to spoil any surprises, when it comes time for the big finale, it pulls out all the feel-good stops. Cynics in the audience might fail to be as enchanted as it wants them to be.
And yet, it all works wonderfully, largely because of its cast. Soni and Groff have an instantly tangible chemistry, and their differing personalities complement each other perfectly. Individually, they take us with them on their personal journeys with just as much clarity and conviction, and the movie would fall flat without the strength of their performances at its core.
Equally superb, however, are Patel and Garg, whose discomfort over the preparations for their sonās wedding never feel like they come from anywhere but love and a desire to share in his happiness; and Suri, whose considerable comedic talents contrast to great effect with the brewing discord within her character, lends a much-needed weight to the mix while still managing to glow alongside all her costars.
Combined with the sharp, funny, and insightful script and the generosity of Sethiās directorial approach, which frames each character with respect and import to the story, it all makes āA Nice Indian Boyā a nice crowd-pleasing movie to see. It may or may not be āthe great gay romcom,ā and it might all seem a bit too glossy and perfect for some viewersā taste ā but it offers a refreshing look at what is possible when a family is willing to make changes in their way of life simply for the sake of love. What message could be more positive than that?
āA Nice Indian Boyā is now playing in theaters.
Movies
Sexy small town secrets surface in twisty French āMisericordiaā
A deliciously depraved story with finely orchestrated tension

The name Alain Guiraudie might not be familiar to most Americans, but if you mention āStranger by the Lake,ā fans of great cinema (and especially great queer cinema) are sure to recognize it immediately as the title of the French filmmakerās most successful work to date.
The 2013 thriller, which earned a place in that yearās āUn Certain Regardā section of the Cannes Film Festival and went on to become an international success, mesmerized audiences with its tense and erotically charged tale of dangerous attraction between two cruisers at a gay beach, one of whom may or may not be a murderer. Taut, mysterious, and transgressively explicit, its Hitchcockian blend of suspense, romance, and provocative psychological exploration made for a dark but irresistibly sexy thrill ride that was a hit with both critics and audiences alike.
In the decade since, heās continued to create masterful films in Europe, becoming a favorite not only at Cannes but other prestigious international festivals. His movies, each in their own way, have continued to elaborate on similar themes about the intertwined impulses of desire, fear, and violence, and his most recent work ā āMisericordia,ā which began a national rollout in U.S. theaters last weekend ā is no exception; in fact, it draws all the familiar threads together to create something that feels like an answer to the questions heās been raising throughout his career. To reach it, however, he concocts a story of small town secrets and hidden connections so twisted that it leaves a whole array of other questions in its wake.
It centers on JĆ©rĆ©mie (FĆ©lix Kysyl), an unemployed baker who returns to the woodsy rustic village where he spent his youth for the funeral of his former boss and mentor. Welcomed into the dead manās home by his widow, Martine (Catherine Frot), the visitor decides to extend his stay as he reconnects to his old home town and his memories. His lingering presence, however, triggers jealousy and suspicion from her son ā and his own former school chum ā Vincent (Jean-Baptiste Durand), who fears he has ulterior motives, while his sudden interest in another old acquaintance, Walter (David Ayala), only seems to make matters worse. It doesnāt take long before circumstances erupt into a violent confrontation, enmeshing JĆ©rĆ©mie in a convoluted web of danger and deception that somehow seems rooted in the unspoken feelings and hidden relationships of his past.
The hard thing in writing about a movie like āMisericordiaā is that thereās really not much one can reveal without spoiling some of its mysteries. To discuss its plot in detail, or even address some of the deeper issues that drive it, is nearly impossible without giving away too much. Thatās because itās a movie that, like āStranger by the Lakeā and much of Guiraudieās other work, hinges as much on what we donāt know as what we do. Indeed, in its earlier scenes, we are unsure even of the relationships between its characters. We have a sense that JĆ©rĆ©mie is perhaps a returning prodigal son, that Vincent might be his brother, or a former lover, or both, and thatās just stating the most obvious ambiguities. Some of these cloudy details are made clear, while others are not, though several implied probabilities emerge with a little skill at reading between the lines; it hardly matters, really, because as the story proceeds, new shocks and surprises come our way which create new mysteries to replace the others ā and itās all on shaky ground to begin with, because despite his status as the filmās de facto protagonist, we are never really sure what JĆ©rĆ©mieās real intentions are, let alone whether they are good or bad.
Thatās not sloppy writing, though ā itās carefully crafted design. By keeping so much of the movieās ābackstoryā shrouded in loaded silence, Guiraudie ā who also wrote the screenplay ā reminds us that we can never truly know what is in someone elseās head (or our own, for that matter), underscoring the inevitable risk that comes with any relationship ā especially when our passions overcome our better judgment. Itās the same grim theme that was at the dark heart of āStranger,ā given a (slightly) less macabre treatment, perhaps, but nevertheless there to make us ponder just how far we are willing to place ourselves in danger for the sake of getting what ā or who ā we desire.
As for who desires what in āMisericordia,ā thatās often as much of a mystery as everything else in this seemingly sleepy little village. Throughout the film, the sparks that fly between its people often carry mixed signals. Sex and hostility seem locked in an uncertain dance, and itās as hard for the audience to know which will take the lead as it is for the characters ā and if the conflicting tone of the subtext isnāt enough to make one wonder just how sexually adventurous (and fluid) these randy villagers really are beneath their polite and provincial exteriors, the unexpected liaisons that occur along the way should leave no doubt.
Yet for all its murky morality and guilty secrets, and despite its ominous motif of evil lurking behind a wholesome small-town surface, Guiraudieās pastoral film noir goes beyond all that to find a surprisingly humane layer rising above it all, for which the townās seemingly omnipresent priest (Jacques Develay) emerges to highlight in the filmās third act ā though to reveal more about that (or about him) would be one of those spoilers we like to avoid.
Thereās a clue to be found, however, in the filmās very title, which in Catholic tradition refers to the merciful compassion of God for the suffering of humanity, but can be literally translated simply as āmercy.ā Though it spends much of its time illuminating the sordid details of private human behavior, and though the journey it takes is often quite harrowing, āMisericordiaā has an open heart for all of its broken, stunted, and even toxic characters; Guiraudie treats them not as heroes or villains, but as flawed, confused, and entirely relatable human beings. In the end, we may not know all of their dirty secrets, we feel like we know them ā and in knowing them can find a share of that all-forgiving mercy for even the worst of them.
Itās worth mentioning that itās also a movie with a lot of humor, brimming with comically absurd character moments that somehow remind us of our own foibles even as we laugh at theirs. The cast, led by the opaquely sincere Kysyl and the delicately provocative Frot, forge a perfect ensemble to create the playful-yet-gripping tone of ambiguity ā moral, sexual, and otherwise ā thatās essential in making Guiraudieās sly and ultimately wise observations about humanity come across.
And come across they do ā but what makes āMisericordiaā truly resonate is that they never overshadow its deliciously depraved story, nor dilute the finely orchestrated tension his film maintains to keep your heart pounding as you take it all in.
To tell the truth, we already want to watch it again.
Movies
Stellar cast makes for campy fun in āThe Parentingā
New horror comedy a clever, saucy piece of entertainment

If youāve ever headed off for a dream getaway that turned out to be an AirBnB nightmare instead, you might be in the target audience for āThe Parentingā ā and if you also happen to be in a queer relationship and have had the experience of āmeeting the parents,ā then it was essentially made just for you.
Now streaming on Max, where it premiered on March 13, and helmed by veteran TV (āLooking,ā āMinxā) and film (āThe Skeleton Twins,ā āAlex Strangeloveā) director Craig Johnson from a screenplay by former āSNLā writer Kurt Sublette, itās a very gay horror comedy in which a young couple goes through both of those excruciatingly relatable experiences at once. And for those who might be a bit squeamish about the horror elements, we can assure you without spoilers that the emphasis is definitely on the comedy side of this equation.
Set in upstate New York, it centers on a young gay couple ā Josh (Brandon Flynn) and Rohan (Nik Dodani) ā who are happily and obviously in love, and they are proud doggie daddies to prove it. In fact, they are so much in love that Rohan has booked a countryside house specifically to propose marriage, with the pretext of assembling both sets of their parents so that each of them can meet the otherās family for the very first time. They arrive at their rustic rental just in time for an encounter with their quirky-but-amusing host (Parker Posey), whose hints that the house may have a troubling history leave them snickering.
When their respective families arrive, things go predictably awry. Rohanās adopted parents (Edie Falco, Brian Cox) are successful, sophisticated, and aloof; Joshās folks (Lisa Kudrow, Dean Norris) are down-to-earth, unpretentious, and gregarious; to make things even more awkward, the coupleās BFF gal pal Sara (Vivian Bang) shows up uninvited, worried that Rohanās secret engagement plan will go spectacularly wrong under the unpredictable circumstances. Those hiccups, and worse, begin to fray Josh and Rohanās relationship at the edges, revealing previously unseen sides of each other that make them doubt their fitness as a couple ā but theyāre nothing compared to what happens when they discover that theyāre also sharing the house with a 400-year-old paranormal entity, who has big plans of its own for the weekend after being trapped there alone for decades. To survive ā and to save their marriage before it even happens ā they must unite with each other and the rest of their feuding guests to defeat it, before it uses them to escape and wreak its evil will upon the world.
Drawing from a long tradition of āhaunted houseā tropes, āThe Parentingā takes to heart its heritage in this campiest-of-all horror settings, from the gathering of antagonistic strangers that come together to confront its occult secrets to the macabre absurdity of its humor, much of which is achieved by juxtaposing the arcane with the banal as it filters its supernatural clichĆ©s through the familiar trappings of everyday modern life; secret spells can be found in WiFi passwords instead of ancient scrolls, the noisy disturbances of a poltergeist can be mistaken for unusually loud sex in the next room, and the shocking obscenities spewed from the mouth of a malevolent spectre can seem as mundane as the homophobic chatter of your Boomer uncle at the last family gathering.
At the same time, itās a movie that treats its āhookā ā the unpredictable clash of personalities that threatens to mar any first-time meeting with the family or friends of a new partner, so common an experience as to warrant a separate sub-genre of movies in itself ā as something more than just an excuse to bring this particular group of characters together. The interpersonal politics and still-developing dynamics between each of the three couples centered by the plot are arguably more significant to the filmās purpose than the goofy details of its backstory, and it is only by navigating those treacherous waters that either of their objectives (combining families and conquering evil) can be met; even Sara, who represents the chosen family already shared by the movieās two would-be grooms, has her place in the negotiations, underlining the perhaps-already-obvious parallels that can be drawn from a story about bridging our differences and rising above our egos to work together for the good of all.
Of course, most horror movies (including the comedic ones) operate with a similar reliance on subtext, serving to give them at least the suggestion of allegorical intent around some real-world issue or experience ā but one of the key takeaways from āThe Parentingā is how much more satisfyingly such narrative formulas can play when the movie in question assembles a cast of Grade-A actors to bring them to life, and this one ā which brings together veteran scene-stealers Falco, Kudrow, Cox, Norris, and resurgent āitā girl Posey, adding another kooky characterization to a resume full of them ā plays that as its winning card. Theyāre helped by Sublettās just-intelligent-enough script, of course, which benefits from a refusal to take itself too seriously and delivers plenty of juicy opportunities for each of its actors to strut their stuff, including the hilarious Bang; but itās their high-octane skills that bring it to life with just the right mix of farcical caricature and redeeming humanity. Heading the pack as the movieās main couple, the exceptional talent and chemistry of Dodani and Flynn help them hold their own among the seasoned ensemble, and make it easy for us to be invested enough in their couplehood to root for them all the way through.
As for the horror, though Johnsonās movie plays mostly for laughs, it does give its otherworldly baddie a certain degree of dignity, even though his menace is mostly cartoonish. Indeed, at times the film is almost reminiscent of an edgier version of āScooby-Dooā, which is part of its goofy charm, but its scarier moments have enough bite to leave reasonable doubt about the possibility of a happy ending. Even so, āThe Parentingā likes its shocks to be ridiculous ā itās closer to āBeetlejuiceā than to āThe Shiningā in tone ā and anyone looking for a truly terrifying horror film wonāt find it here.
What they will find is a brisk, clever, saucy, and yes, campy piece of entertainment that will keep you smiling almost all the way through its hour-and-a-half runtime, with the much-appreciated bonus of an endearing queer romance ā and a refreshingly atypical one, at that ā at its heart. And if watching it in our current political climate evokes yet another allegory in the mix, about the resurgence of an ancient hate during a gay coupleās bid for acceptance from their families, well maybe thatās where the horror comes in.
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