National
Lesbian guardsman calls on Boehner to drop DOMA defense
Cancer patient fears she may not ‘have the time to wait’
A lesbian guardsman suffering from cancer is calling on House Speaker John Boehner to stop defending the Defense of Marriage Act in court.
She met with staff in his D.C. office on Thursday in an effort to convince the Ohio Republican to discontinue support for the anti-gay law.
Chief Warrant Officer Charlie Morgan met with Katherine Haley, a policy assistant to Boehner, to ask the speaker to drop defense of DOMA so that upon her death, her spouse, Kathy Morgan, can receive federal benefits. Morgan serves in the New Hampshire National Guard and just returned from deployment in Kuwait.
In September 2011, the guardsman was diagnosed with stage-four incurable breast cancer. After being first diagnosed in 2008 and undergoing a double mastectomy and chemotherapy, Morgan was declared cancer-free and deployed to Kuwait, but was later informed her cancer had returned and has resumed chemotherapy.
“I’m very worried about the military survivor benefits for Karen if I don’t survive this bout with cancer,” Morgan said in a Washington Blade interview. “I explained to her that I wasn’t afraid to die, but I was worried that Karen would not receive the same spousal survivor benefits as our heterosexual counterparts.”
Among the benefits that Morgan is seeking for her spouse are survivor’s benefits, Social Security benefits and health insurance coverage.
Morgan said Boehner’s staffer spoke with her for about 15 to 20 minutes and was “polite” and “empathetic,” but said Boehner would probably continue to defend DOMA in court.
“I told her that I believe in miracles, but it was important for her to relate to the speaker that I need this to happen now because I don’t have the time necessarily to wait through the legislative or judicial process,” Morgan said. “If he were to not defend DOMA, that would immediately [help] my family and benefit us.”
Michael Steele, a Boehner spokesperson, confirmed “the meeting did occur,” but declined to offer any more information about the discussion or Morgan’s call for Boehner to discontinue his defense of DOMA.
The Morgans are among the plaintiffs in the lawsuit that Servicemembers Legal Defense Network filed in October on behalf of gay troops and veterans against DOMA on the basis that the anti-gay law blocks them form receiving federal benefits afforded to service members in opposite-sex marriages. Morgan attended the meeting with Boehner’s staff along with David McKean, an SLDN attorney.
During the meeting, Morgan submitted photos of herself in uniform, and with her partner and daughter as well as a letter dated Feb. 9 about her struggle with cancer, her family’s military history and how the veterans benefits her mother received upon the death of her father, who was in the Army and deployed twice to Germany, helped her keep “a roof over our heads and food on the table.”
“The military informs us that it is only as strong as the families that support it,” the letter states. “In turn, my military leadership supports my efforts to attain benefits to take care of my family. As a service member who has proven that I am willing to die for my country I am asking you not to defend DOMA for the sake of the many people whose lives it negatively impacts.”
The meeting follows a similar letter dated Dec. 23 that Morgan sent to Boehner asking him for a meeting to discuss the negative impact that DOMA has on her family.
After the Justice Department announced last year President Obama had determined DOMA was unconstitutional and would no longer defend the statute against litigation, Boehner convened the Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group in the House, which voted in March along party lines to take up defense in the administration’s stead.
Congress is unlikely to repeal DOMA legislatively given its given makeup. The Senate Judiciary Committee reported out legislation to repeal the law in November, but there are no plans for a floor vote. Success on the House floor is unlikely and Boehner has indicated he won’t bring up the repeal legislation to a vote.
The Obama administration has a deadline of Feb. 28 to respond to the lawsuit in which Morgan is a plaintiff. The administration is expected to decline to take up defense of the law and for Boehner to take up defense of the law as he has with other DOMA cases.
Aubrey Sarvis, SLDN’s executive director, said in a statement Boehner should drop defense of DOMA so the courts can decide the constitutionality of the anti-gay law on their own and permit Morgan and others in same-sex relationships to receive federal benefits.
“Our message for Speaker Boehner and others today is simply this: Chief Warrant Officer Charlie Morgan can’t wait,” Sarvis said. “She and her family deserve equal treatment, and she may not have years for this process to play out in the courts or on Capitol Hill. Speaker Boehner can make a difference here, and we respectfully ask him to take a look at this case and get to know this family. We are confident that when he does, he will see that these discriminatory laws hurt our military, harm families and are indefensible.”
The meeting with Boehner’s office isn’t the only one Morgan had on Capitol Hill. The lesbian guardsman also met with her member of Congress, Rep. Frank Guinta (R-N.H.), about her desire for Boehner to discontinue defense of DOMA. SLDN’s McKean was present during this meeting as well.
Morgan said she spoke with Guinta for close to 10 minutes. She said he was also “empathetic” to her situation and said he’d “see what he can do.”
“I also explained to him that I knew that he was pro-military because he comes from New Hampshire and the congressional delegates from New Hampshire are pro-military,” Morgan said. “But I explained to him that for me it was a military issue. It wasn’t just my issue. It was an issue for all other thousands of gay and lesbian families in the same situation across the nation.”
A spokesperson for Guinta declined to comment on the meeting, saying its was a private discussion between the lawmaker and one of his constituents. Guinta isn’t a co-sponsor of the Respect for Marriage Act, legislation that would repeal DOMA.
In addition to the lawsuit, SLDN also launched an online petition at Change.org on the same day of the meeting calling on Boehner to discontinue his defense of DOMA in court. As of late afternoon on Thursday, the petition had 211 signatures.
State Department
State Department implements anti-trans bathroom policy
Memo notes directive corresponds with White House executive order
The State Department on April 20 announced employees cannot use bathrooms that correspond with their gender identity.
The Daily Signal, a conservative news website, reported the State Department announced the new policy in a memo titled “Updates Regarding Biological Sex and Intimate Spaces, Including Restrooms.”
The State Department has not responded to the Washington Blade’s request for comment on the directive.
“The administration affirms that there are two sexes — male and female — and that federal facilities should operate on this objective and longstanding basis to ensure consistency, privacy, and safety in shared spaces,” State Department spokesperson Tommy Piggot told the Daily Signal. “In line with President Trump’s executive order this provides clear, uniform guidance to the department by grounding policy in biological sex as determined at birth.”
President Donald Trump shortly after he took office in January 2025 issued an executive order that directed the federal government to only recognize two genders: male and female. The sweeping directive also ordered federal government agencies to “effectuate this policy by taking appropriate action to ensure that intimate spaces designated for women, girls, or females (or for men, boys, or males) are designated by sex and not identity.”
The Daily Signal notes the new State Department policy “does not prohibit single-occupancy restrooms.”
National
I’m telling the scared little girl I once was it’s okay to feel free
This week is Lesbian Visibility Week
Uncloseted Media published this article on April 23.
By SOPHIE HOLLAND | At 13 years old, I remember looking in the mirror in my Toronto bathroom and thinking, “Yeah, I’m a lesbian.” At the time, I thought it was a dirty word. Thinking back, it could be because the first time I heard it was when a family member said, “I don’t know what a lesbian is, they are like aliens.”
And although I walked around in camouflage Crocs with a rainbow My Little Pony charm, plaid knee-length shorts and a shark tooth necklace (yes, these are all, in my opinion, stereotypically lesbian apparel!), I didn’t feel like I fit the mold. The longer I thought about it, the worse I felt, so I buried my feelings deep inside.
Now I am 25, and I have been out since I was 22. Three years ago, I never could have imagined that I’d be working for a queer news publication and celebrating Lesbian Visibility Week, an annual event meant to honor and uplift lesbian perspectives and highlight the hardships our community faces. To me, LVW is so important because, frankly, it has been an absolute shit show getting here, to a place where I feel love and joy most days.
I think back to the frustration of constantly being asked, “Do you have a boyfriend?” Of watching princess movies and seeing a broken girl only find herself when her prince charming arrives. I remember listening to music that was always about heterosexual relationships. I remember feeling left out in high school when, one by one, my friends got boyfriends.
I tried the boyfriend, and I tried really hard for it to work at a large detriment to my wellbeing. I brainwashed myself into thinking I was probably bisexual, which I told my closest friends around 16 and unsuccessfully told my parents at the same age. I was probably subconsciously using this as a litmus test of their acceptance and to soothe the anxiety I felt around my sexuality.
Learning to love who I am did not only come from me unraveling my internalized lesbophobia and dissecting the oppressive societal messages of heteronormativity. It came from meeting an awesome community of lesbians and queers. I found people who understood my worldview and who showed me the ropes. I no longer had to stutter over concepts like lesbian loneliness or my frustration with misogynistic straight men.
They all just got it.
Without this community, I am not sure if I could be as warm and confident in myself as I am today.
And while I still experience homophobia, like being spat on while walking with an ex in downtown Toronto or having a stranger yell in my face “Are you fucking lesbians?” in Kensington Market, the joy and love still outweighs the nasty.
So, as the sentimental dyke that I have become, I decided to ask a set of lesbians in my orbit — including my friends as well as Uncloseted staffers, board members and followers — if they would share a little bit about what makes them love being a lesbian. And now, I can share it with all of you. Here they are. Happy LVW!
Timi Sotire
Falling in love with her was a reset. I felt like a kid again, hopeful about the future. We’ve had to overcome many obstacles to be together, but I’d choose her in every lifetime. I was sick with a long-term health condition when we met, and hanging out with Sophia really helped me with my recovery after my surgery.
Bella Sayegh
Being a lesbian is one of the most beautiful things in the world. To be authentically yourself in resistance and joy is so special within the lesbian community.
Parker Wales
When I met Liv, I finally understood why almost every song is about love.
Gillian Kilgour
There is no connection quite as perfect as between lesbians, no one sees me like my lesbians do.
Chyna Price
There’s many things I love about being a lesbian. But here are my top three:
- There’s just a deeper understanding when it comes to being loved by another woman.
- The next one would be the sense of community, especially being a POC masculine-presenting lesbian. I don’t feel like I’m cosplaying as someone else like I felt like I was doing before I came out.
- There’s so much history going back to the 1800s on how we found and fought for our love. That fight makes me proud because it shows me … that we’ve [found] ways to express our love even when it was misunderstood, illegal and deemed as madness.
Hope Pisoni
Before I knew I was a lesbian, romantic relationships seemed suffocating — it felt like everyone would expect me to act my part in the meticulous performance that is heterosexuality. But meeting my spouse and discovering our identities together showed me just how freeing it could be to love without a script to follow.
Leital Molad
It was the joy of watching the New York Sirens defeat the Toronto Sceptres at our first professional women’s hockey game — surrounded by hundreds (maybe thousands?) of cheering lesbians.
Angela Earl
I spent years building a life that looked right. But I never felt settled, and eventually I started asking what would actually make me happy. Coming out was about more than who I love, it was letting go of everything I was told to be. The last few years have felt like coming home to a life that had been waiting for me.
Tali Bray
What I love about being a lesbian is what I love about being in love … the wonder and joy of “oh, this is what it’s supposed to feel like.” I love moving through the world with women.
Izzy Stokes
I didn’t fall in love until I realized that queerness was an option. My queer friends have helped me see so much more than I grew up seeing. I’m so proud of us, and I’m so grateful for my lesbian community.
Nandika Chatterjee
When I met my fiancée is when I started to feel most like myself. That meant loving myself for who I am and embracing my identity as a lesbian. I felt free in a way I have never before. That’s the long and short of it.
Liz Lucking
The love and joy of being a lesbian is getting to live the life I dreamed of but never thought I would get to have!
Reflections
As I read these beautiful entries, it’s not lost on me that we’re still living in a world where lesbians are more likely to struggle with maternity problems, fetishization, and compulsory heterosexuality — not to mention the intersectional pressures of racism from both inside and outside the queer community. That’s part of why, according to a 2024 survey, 22 percent of LGBTQ women have attempted suicide, and 66 percent have sought treatment for trauma.
So if you are a lesbian who isn’t out or doesn’t feel safe, I hope you read this and can glean some hope from these messages. So when you look in the mirror, you know that it’s okay to release the weight — which can feel so heavy — of a heteronormative world.
We still have a long fight until all lesbians can feel safe to be themselves, but this is a community that does not back away from the tough, from the joy, from being loud and from all the other things that it takes to start a small revolution.
Hell yeah, lesbians! Here’s to you.
*I am signing off with my cat on my lap and a pride flag over my head <3.

Cuba
Trans parent charged with kidnapping, allegedly fled to Cuba with child
Cuban authorities helped locate Rose Inessa-Ethington
Federal authorities have charged a transgender woman with kidnapping after she allegedly fled to Cuba with her 10-year-old child.
An affidavit that Federal Bureau of Investigation Special Agent Jennifer Waterfield filed in U.S. District Court for the District of Utah on April 16 notes the child is a “biological male who identifies as a female” and “splits time living with divorced parents who share custody” in Cache County, Utah.
Waterfield notes the child on March 28 “was supposed to be traveling by car to” Calgary, Alberta, “for a planned camping trip with his transgender mother, Rose Inessa-Ethington, Rose’s partner, Blue Inessa-Ethington, and Blue’s 3-year-old child.”
The affidavit notes the group instead flew from Vancouver, British Columbia, to Mexico City on March 29. Waterfield writes the Inessa-Ethingtons and the two children then flew from Mérida, Mexico, to Havana on April 1.
The 10-year-old child called her biological mother on March 28 after they arrived in Canada. The custody agreement, according to the affidavit, required Rose Inessa-Ethington to return the child to her former spouse on April 3.
“Interviews of MV [Minor Victim] 1’s family members provided significant concerns for MV 1’s well-being, as MV 1 was born a male, however, identifies as a female child, which is largely believed to be due to manipulation by Rose Inessa-Ethington,” reads the affidavit. “Concerns exist that MV 1 was transported to Cuba for gender reassignment surgery prior to puberty.”
The affidavit indicates authorities found a note in the Inessa-Ethingtons’ home with “instruction from a mental health therapist located in Washington, D.C., including instruction to send the therapist the $10,000.00 and instructions on gender-affirming medical care for children.”
The affidavit does not identify the specific “mental health therapist” in D.C.
A Utah judge on April 13 ordered Rose Inessa-Ethington to “immediately” return the child to her former spouse. The former spouse also received sole custody.
“Your affiant believes that due to the extensive planning and preparation exhibited by both Rose Inessa-Ethington and Blue Inessa-Ethington to isolate MV 1 and take MV 1 to Havana, Cuba, without notifying or requesting permission from MV 1’s mother indicates they are likely not planning to return to the United States,” wrote Waterfield.
The affidavit notes Cuban authorities found the Inessa-Ethingtons and the child.
A press release the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the District of Utah issued notes the Inessa-Ethingtons “were deported from Cuba” on Monday “with the assistance of the FBI.”
The couple has been charged with International Parental Kidnapping. The Inessa-Ethingtons were arraigned in Richmond, Va., on Monday. The press release notes a federal court in Salt Lake City will soon handle the case.
The New York Times reported the child is now back with their biological mother.
“We are grateful to law enforcement for working swiftly to return the child to the biological mother,” said First Assistant U.S. Attorney Melissa Holyoak of the District of Utah in the press release.
The case is unfolding against the backdrop of increased tensions between Washington and Havana after U.S. forces on Jan. 3 seized now former Venezuelan President Nicolás Maduro and his wife, Cilia Flores.
President Donald Trump shortly after he took office in January 2025 issued an executive order that directed the federal government to only recognize two genders: male and female. A second White House directive banned federally-funded gender-affirming care for anyone under 19.
The U.S. Supreme Court last year in the Skrmetti decision upheld a Tennessee law that bans gender-affirming care for minors.
Cuba’s national health care system has offered free sex-reassignment surgeries since 2008.
Activists who are critical of Mariela Castro, the daughter of former President Raúl Castro who spearheads LGBTQ issues as director of Cuba’s National Center for Sexual Education, have previously told the Washington Blade that access to these procedures is limited. The Blade on Wednesday asked a contact in Havana to clarify whether Cuban law currently allows minors to undergo sex-reassignment surgery.

