Arts & Entertainment
Queery: Sterling Washington
The Federation of Black Prides manager and singer answers 20 gay questions
Sterling Washington jokes about the time he became a “professional homosexual” when he went to work for Us Helping Us.
He’d previously been a presidential appointee (he was an assistant in the Office of Administration) in the Clinton White House, he then worked in IT work for several years, went back to school at Howard to get a second degree, then landed at Us Helping Us working in development. Since July 2008, he’s been resource and grant development manager at the International Federation of Black Prides. Previously he served on the board of D.C. Black Pride.
Washington, a native Washingtonian, says the Federation does important work.
“Each of the Black Prides have advocacy projects they execute in local communities that could be anything from HIV work to youth empowerment to pushing for pro-LGBT legislation,” he says. “I think that work is very important.”
Washington is also a singer and sings tenor in the choir at the National City Christian Church in Thomas Circle. He loves opera and jazz and dreams perhaps one day of living in Vienna.
Washington grew up in the District’s Shepherd Park area and enjoys watching TV, reading, dining out with friends, acupuncture, walks in the woods and playing the piano in his free time. He’s single, though he’s recently been dating someone more regularly. (Blade photo by Michael Key)
How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell?
I’ve been out since 1994, when I was in undergrad at GWU. The hardest person to tell was my mother, who took the news better than I expected. Since she insisted on telling my father herself, I was spared the stress associated with telling him. Although they were a little resistant at first, both of my parents grew to accept my sexual orientation over time.
Who’s your LGBT hero?
This is difficult to answer because there are so many. Dr. Zachary Gabriel Green, a clinical psychologist and an expert on group dynamics, is definitely one of my LGBT heroes. He has done amazing work around identity-based conflicts and leadership development, publishing numerous papers on those subjects. Dr. Green and his husband, Dr. Rene Molenkamp, really helped in my coming out process and they remain good friends of mine. There’s also the late Bayard Rustin, who was an extraordinary community organizer. Like Rustin, I am an activist and singer.
What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present?
It’s a tie between The Andalusian Dog and “The Deep End” at Club Andalu. The former was around in the late ’90s and was located near 14th and U streets, N.W. The latter had its heyday in 2002-2004 and featured the music of DJ Mandrill, who is fantastic.
Describe your dream wedding.
My husband and I would wed in a romantic outdoor setting, followed by a lavish reception and dancing under the stars.
What non-LGBT issue are you most passionate about?
Environmental issues. In fact, I Tweet a lot more about environmental issues than LGBT issues. Environmental degradation impacts every living thing on the planet.
What historical outcome would you change?
The 2000 presidential election, which remains the most disappointing election of my life.
What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime?
The release of the “Star Wars” prequels, although Episode III was the only one I really enjoyed.
On what do you insist?
Understanding and respect for other people’s culture and religious beliefs.
What was your last Facebook post or Tweet?
I Tweeted a petition in support of the Community Renewables Act of 2012, which is coming before D.C. City Council.
If your life were a book, what would the title be?
“On My Journey Now” would be the title. It is inspired by one of my favorite African-American spirituals.
If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?
Nothing. To quote the late Frank Kameny, “Gay is good.”
What do you believe in beyond the physical world?
A loving and inclusive God and an afterlife.
What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders?
My advice is to attend a Tavistock group relations conference. These leadership conferences use experiential learning to uncover the unconscious processes that affect how organizations operate. I’ve been to at least five of these conferences, four as a member and once as an administrator. I have learned something new about myself every time and acquired knowledge and skills that improved the effectiveness of organizations in which I served.
What would you walk across hot coals for?
Since I’m a foodie, I’d walk across hot coals for a great meal.
What LGBT stereotype annoys you most?
The assumption that LGBT people are trying to convert all heterosexuals to our sexual orientation. Sure, we’re trying to convert some of them, but not all!
What’s your favorite LGBT movie?
“Latter Days” is my favorite, although this changes often.
What’s the most overrated social custom?
Answering one’s cell phone or texting back as soon as someone calls or text messages you. It is important to have personal time. Besides, it is not appropriate to answer the phone or text everywhere.
What trophy or prize do you most covet?
I would like to receive the designation of Kammersänger by the Austrian government. It is a title given to a distinguished singer and it is rare for an American to receive it.
What do you wish you’d known at 18?
That the popular images of LGBT people in the media are not reflective of the entire community.
Why Washington?
Well, I was born here and just never left. While I do not plan to stay here forever, Washington is a nice place to live, despite my occasional frustrations with the city.
Out & About
LGBTQ Military Happy Hour set for Sept. 15
In-person gathering to be held at Tom’s Watch Bar
Modern Military Association of America will host “Pride in Service: An LGBTQ+ Military Happy Hour” on Tuesday, Sept. 15 at 4 p.m. at Tom’s Watch Bar.
This in-person gathering is the perfect chance to connect, share stories, and celebrate the diversity within the military community. Come relax, meet fellow LGBTQ+ service members and allies, and enjoy a fun, supportive atmosphere. Don’t miss out on an evening full of pride, camaraderie, and good vibes. Visit Eventbrite for more details.
Friday, September 11
Go Gay DC will host “Out in DC LGBTQ+ Community Social” at 7 p.m. at Hotel Zena.This is a chance to relax, make new friends, and enjoy happy hour specials at this classic retro venue. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.
Women in their Twenties and Thirties will meet at 8 p.m. on Zoom. This is a social discussion group for queer women in the Washington, D.C. area. For more details, visit Facebook.
Saturday, September 12
Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Brunch” at 11 a.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant. This fun weekly event brings the DMV area LGBTQ+ community, including allies, together for delicious food and conversation. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.
The DC LGBTQ+ Community Center will host screenings of “Princess Sparkles” and “Kiloran Bay” at 1:30 p.m. “Kiloran Bay” is a 13-minute musical short set amid the wild beauty of the Scottish Hebrides and the fierce joy of a wedding cèilidh. “Princess Sparkles” is about a girl who accidentally signs up to pet-sit a princess only to discover she’s actually a nippy, Fox News-watching pig. More details are available on the DC LGBTQ+ Community Center’s website.
Sunday, September 13
“Nellie’s DC Drag Brunch” will be at 12 p.m. at Nellie’s Sports Bar. Come get served like a queen by a queen. Join Sapphire Blue, Deja Diamond and their team of amazing drag performers for the most fun you’ll have all weekend. Tickets are $58.51 and are available on Eventbrite.
Monday, September 14
“Center Aging: Monday Coffee Klatch” will be at 10:00a.m. on Zoom. This is a social hour for older LGBTQ+ adults. Guests are encouraged to bring a beverage of choice. For more information, contact Adam ([email protected]).
Tuesday, September 15
Center Bi Pan+ Roundtable will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This is an opportunity for people to gather in order to discuss issues related to bisexuality or as Bi individuals in a private setting. Visit Facebook or Meetup for more information.
Wednesday, September 16
Job Club will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom upon request. This is a weekly job support program to help job entrants and seekers, including the long-term unemployed, improve self-confidence, motivation, resilience and productivity for effective job searches and networking — allowing participants to move away from being merely “applicants” toward being “candidates.” For more information, email [email protected] or visit thedccenter.org/careers.
The DC LGBTQ+ Community Center will host “Movement for Healing” at 3 p.m. This trauma- and yoga therapy–informed class is designed to help guests gently reconnect with their body and their breath. Through mindful movement, somatic awareness, and grounding practices, guests will explore how to release tension, increase mobility, and cultivate a deeper sense of safety and ease within. For more details, visit the DC Center’s website.
Thursday, September 17
The DC Center’s Fresh Produce Program will be held all day at the DC LGBTQ+ Community Center. People will be informed on Wednesday at 5:00 pm if they are picked to receive a produce box. No proof of residency or income is required. For more information, email [email protected] or call 202-682-2245.
Virtual Yoga Class will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This free weekly class is a combination of yoga, breathwork and meditation that allows LGBTQ+ community members to continue their healing journey with somatic and mindfulness practices. For more details, visit the DC LGBTQ+ Community Center’s website.
Books
Historiography with heart
Pioneering author John D’Emilio continues to enlighten us in new book ‘Making Gay History’
‘Making Gay History, Memoir of a Scholar-Activist’
By John D’Emilio
Dukeupress.edu/making-gay-history
“Dear Dr. Kameny,” wrote the earnest graduate history student almost 50 years ago. “As you know, the academic community only rarely deemed the lives of gay men and women to be worthy of serious scholarly study. To my knowledge, no American history faculty at a major university has yet sponsored a dissertation that deals with gays historically.”
That student was a young man from the Bronx who would change all that. His name is John D’Emilio.
“I must be able to uncover ‘manuscript’ sources, that is unpublished and unique historical materials,” he explained to D.C. gay civil rights pioneer Dr. Franklin E. Kameny who lived in a house stacked to the ceiling with “unique historical materials.” In reality, these were piles of correspondence with government officials and politicians, legal filings, mimeograph copies, gay newspapers, press releases, Mattachine Society brochures and picket signs. Frank Kameny, a self-described “pack rat,” invited D’Emilio into his private world of papers and memorabilia to begin uncovering an erased and forgotten pre-Stonewall history. This was one of many such research forays into “basements, garages and overcrowded living rooms” across America conducted by John D’Emilio. He was a young man on fire to complete a Ph.D. dissertation at the frontier of a distant galaxy — writing a scholarly gay and lesbian history backed by original research where there had been none, only a void.
Reading D’Emilio’s memoir “Making Gay History” (2026, Duke University Press) one has the sense of watching an emerging galaxy spinning around a galactic core of New York scholars and their mentors, young activists, and community historians throbbing with the New York City energy celebrated by Walt Whitman a century before in his epic poem “Mannahatta”. Spinning out of the ‘60s anti-Vietnam War activism; Marxist historical analysis, the Stonewall riots and gay liberation, we can see it coalescing around this one history student’s search for a dissertation topic and himself piecing together a new history that “no one had yet written about … a pioneering work in this newly emerging field.” D’Emilio pitches his idea for a dissertation that “spanned the length of U.S. history, moving from the religious teachings that shaped law and social attitudes … to how the federal government dealt with the increasing visibility of a homosexual world in the twentieth century.” With the blessings of Columbia’s Department of History, he completed his dissertation leading to the publication of his groundbreaking history: “Sexual Politics, Sexual Communities: The Making of a Homosexual Minority in the United States” (1983). When he received his first copy of the bound book in the mail, he “cradled the book in my arm holding it close to my chest….It was as if I had fathered a child.”
More so, D’Emilio fathered a new history. Historiography is the story of how history gets written, conducting original research, uncovering the data and creating the narrative(s) — often a snoozing read of academic process. But not this historiography. “Making Gay History” is a historiography with heart.
“Nothing was going to stop me from giving everything I had to this effort at making change in society and myself,” he declares while connecting with others who share his “boundless excitement for the collection of documents.” There were many others in this spiral with D’Emilio who are mentioned and play important roles. In the spiral were Jonathan Ned Katz (“Gay American History”, 1976); Allan Berube (“Coming Our Under Fire” 1990), Martin Duberman (“Hidden from History”, 1989); Daughters of Bilitis activists Del Martin and Barbara Gittings; Civil War historian Eric Foner and author/activist Larry Kramer. No libertarians among them. Well, maybe the divine Bette Midler who was well known for performing uptown at the Continental Baths who makes an appearance at a Washington Square rally.
He craved his parents’ approval. Among the most riveting scenes in the memoir are a series of family dinners in the Bronx with his old-school parents who go into near shock when he tells them he is gay. How to evade this any longer, especially now that his dissertation is going to be on homosexuality? It is a moving and hilarious sequence. After he says it out loud, “I am gay”: “No. No. No!” his father gasps. “This can’t be true. It can’t be.” D’Emilio thinks, “Oh my God, he’s going to die. I’ve killed my father.”
The D’Emilios — Vincent and Sophie — so resemble the wonderful Castorinis in “Moonstruck,” I am thinking “Oh my God, this is Cher coming out to her parents Cosmo and Rose.” The young graduate student survives the family dramatics even more certain that this was not just his success but “a gay liberation success.” From the family dinner table to the streets, he writes how he marched in the 1973 Pride parade beneath a banner held high: “Gay Socialists.” This man is a born scholar-activist.
D’Emilio does not seem able to pull back. There are passages that veer into autobiographical minutia, detail about the grind to earn a living from the University of North Carolina Greensboro to the University of Illinois Chicago. He writes, ”I would be living on less than half my usual salary for the year, but with the small amount of royalties that I got for my three books, plus some occasional speaking gigs and dipping into savings…”. Much of this is gray matter compared to the galaxy John D’Emilio helped energize that even now brightens our sky.
Charles Francis is president of The Mattachine Society of Washington, D.C. and author of “Archive Activism: Memoir of a ‘Uniquely Nasty’ Journey” (University of North Texas, 2023)
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