National
DNC 2012: Gay speakers, issues pervade convention
Delegates approve platform backing marriage equality
San Antonio Mayor Julian Castro dinged Mitt Romney at the Democratic National Convention for his opposition to marriage equality (Blade photo by Michael Key)
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The first official day of the Democratic National Convention showcased the party’s solidarity with the LGBT community as speakers — including several openly gay Democrats — took to the podium to voice support and delegates approved for the first time a platform that endorses marriage equality.
Capping off the evening were high-profile speeches from San Antonio Mayor Julian Castro, who’s considered a rising star in the Democratic Party and possibly a contender for the next governor of Texas, and first lady Michelle Obama. Both mentioned LGBT rights in their speeches to attendees at the Time Warner Cable Arena.
Castro made a reference to marriage equality when reciting a list of issues supported by Democrats, but opposed by Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney. The GOP candidate is against same-sex marriage and has endorsed a Federal Marriage Amendment.
“When it comes to getting the middle class back to work, Mitt Romney says, ‘No,'” Castro said. “When it comes to respecting women’s rights, Mitt Romney says, ‘No.’ When it comes to letting people marry whomever they love, Mitt Romney says, ‘No.'”
Castro continued that Romney also says “no” to expanding access to health care for all Americans, but noted Romney originally said “yes” to that — an allusion to the health care reform Romney helped pass into law as the Massachusetts governor. Castro added, “Gov. Romney has undergone an extreme makeover, and it ain’t pretty.”
The San Antonio mayor’s speech was a hit among attendees at the convention, who held up signs reading “Opportunity” and “Oportunidad” as he spoke.
First Lady Michelle Obama (Blade photo by Michael Key)
Michelle Obama delivered a speech that was more personal, emphasizing her husband’s commitment to his family despite her concerns upon taking office about the sacrifices about what being president meant for their two daughters.
“But today, I have none of those worries from four years ago about whether Barack and I were doing what’s best for our girls,” Michelle Obama said. “Because today, I know from experience that if I truly want to leave a better world for my daughters, and all our sons and daughters … then we must work like never before, and we must once again come together and stand together for the man we can trust to keep moving this great country forward, my husband, our president, President Barack Obama.”
Michelle Obama also hit on her husband’s support for LGBT rights during her remarks when she spoke of his commitment to the people of diverse backgrounds, saying “Barack knows the American Dream because he’s lived it — and he wants everyone in this country to have that same opportunity, no matter who we are, or where we’re from, or what we look like, or who we love.”
The first lady’s speech was widely seen as successful. Attendees at the convention held up slim, vertical signs reading, “We love Michelle Obama” and cheered as she spoke.
Jerame Davis, executive director of the National Stonewall Democrats, noted Michelle Obama’s speech when talking about how Tuesday night at the Democratic convention strongly contrasted with “last week’s Republican hate-fest” in Tampa.
“First Lady Michelle Obama was inspirational and gave us a glimpse of the love she has for her family,” Davis said. “She is the heart and soul of the first family and that was on full display tonight.”
In a historic development, the 5,963 delegates to the convention approved a Democratic platform that for the first time includes a plank supporting marriage equality. Language in the platform also rejects the Defense of Marriage Act and affirms support for the Employment Non-Discrimination Act.
New Jersey Mayor Cory Booker, a co-chair of the platform committee, said prior to the final approval the manifesto embodies the principles of the Democratic Party, including the notion that individuals should be able to pursue the American dream regardless of, among other factors, whom they love.
“This platform of big and practical ideas sets forth an emboldened pathway toward the historic hope which has driven generations of Americans forward,” Booker said. “It is our most fundamental national aspiration—that no matter who you are, no matter what your color, creed, how you choose to pray or who you choose to love, that if you are an American — first generation or fifth — one who is willing to work hard, play by the rules and apply your God-given talents—that you should be able to find a job that pays the bills.”
Delegates approved the platform by a loud voice vote when Democratic National Committee Chair and Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa asked for “yays” and “nays” to accept the manifesto. No one was heard voicing objection to the platform when Villaraigosa asked for the “nays.”
In addition to the high-profile speeches at the end of the evening, at least four openly gay speakers were among those delivering remarks from the podium. Democratic National Committee Treasurer Andrew Tobias, Democratic National Convention Committee CEO Stephen Kerrigan and Service Employees International Union Mary Kay Henry and U.S. Rep. Jared Polis (D-Colo.) delivered remarks.
A primetime speaking slot was awarded to Polis, who is slated to become the most senior openly gay member in the lower chamber of Congress upon the start of next year after Reps. Barney Frank (D-Mass.) and Tammy Baldwin (D-Wis.) finish their final terms as U.S. House members.
Rep. Jared Polis (D-Colo.) (Blade photo by Michael Key)
Polis wasn’t shy about talking about his sexual orientation during his speech. He declared he was gay among other things upon taking the stage, saying, “My name is Jared Polis. My great-grandparents were immigrants. I am Jewish. I am gay. I am a father. I am a son. I am an entrepreneur. I am a congressman from Colorado. I am always an optimist. But first and foremost, I am an American.”
The first openly gay parent to serve in Congress, Polis mentioned his partner, Marlon Reis, by name while emphasizing respect for diversity — for people who may identify as LGBT and others who hold views that are either conservative or progressive.
“So tonight, I don’t just ask my fellow Americans to respect my relationship with my partner Marlon and my role as a father to our son,” Polis said. “I also ask them to respect the Christian family concerned about decaying moral values and crass commercialism. I ask them to respect the difficult decision of a single mother to bring a child into this world, because of her heartfelt beliefs.”
Polis mentioned some of Obama’s pro-LGBT initiatives that he said demonstrates the president’s understanding that progress can only be achieved by working together.
“It is why he repealed ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,’ so that no person is prevented from serving the country they love because of whom they love,” Polis said. “And it is why Barack Obama became the first sitting president in American history to show his personal support for same-sex marriage.”
Democratic National Committee Treasurer Andrew Tobias (Blade photo by Michael Key)
Tobias, who spoke earlier in the day, said his speech marked the fourth time he’s addressed a Democratic National Convention and noted each time he’s made an address he talks about two things: money and equality.
Praising Obama for his work over his first term, Tobias said the administration has “dramatically improved” the lives of millions of LGBT Americans and “at no cost” to anyone else.
Tobias also offered a personal anecdote about being gay as a way to demonstrate the tremendous progress that has been made on LGBT rights in the past few decades.
“In college, I thought I was the only guy in the world who liked other guys,” Tobias said. “Later I found there was someone else like me, our 26-year-old resident tutor. He and I never talked about it at the time. No one talked about being gay back then. People killed themselves over being gay. Tragically, some kids still do.”
Tobias later revealed the identity of that resident tutor, saying he wed another man at a wedding just eight weeks ago, where love that was “unspeakable” nearly a half-century ago was celebrated “by hundreds of people — straight and gay, surfers and senators.”
“In a way, it was a wedding that married my two topics — money and equality — because that young tutor had grown up to become the chairman of the House Financial Services Committee: Barney Frank,” Tobias said.
Kerrigan, who was charged with managing the convention, made no explicit mention of his sexual orientation or LGBT issues during his speech and instead talked about the opportunities at the convention and access through digital media. Neither did SEIU’s Henry, who focused on labor issues while criticizing Romney, saying “Time after time, working families have paid the price for Mitt Romney’s success.”
Gov. Deval Patrick (D-Mass.) (Blade photo by Michael Key)
Many other speakers throughout the evening also hit on LGBT rights as they praised President Obama. They include U.S. Senate candidate Tim Kaine, who said Obama kept his commitment to “fair treatment for LGBT Americans.” Recognition of Obama’s push to end “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” came in addition to Polis from Massachusetts Gov. Deval Patrick; platform committee co-chair and first woman to reach the rank of three-star general in the Army, retired Lt. Gen. Claudia Kennedy; U.S. House candidate Tammy Duckworth; Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel; Maya Soetoro-Ng, Obama’s sister; and actor and former White House official Kal Penn.
Richard Socarides, a gay delegate from New York City and former adviser to President Clinton on LGBT rights, said the developments at the convention added up to “a historic night” for the LGBT community and “a great night for our party.”
“Our platform plank was adopted plus every speaker seemed so proud to be the party of all America, including us,” Socarides said. “I thought — we are part of this party’s vision of America.”
The pro-LGBT developments came in stark contrast to last week’s Republican National Convention, when no openly speaker was at the podium and speakers advocated for traditional marriage. Delegates in Tampa also approved a platform limiting marriage to one man, one woman and endorsing a Federal Marriage Amendment.
Jimmy LaSalvia, executive director of the gay conservative group GOProud, nonetheless was dismissive of what happened on the first night of the Democratic convention.
“Nothing that they could put in the platform would do anything to cover up President Obama’s disastrous record on jobs and the economy,” LaSalvaia said. “All the openly gay speakers and wonderful feel-good platform language won’t change the fact that, just like everyone else in America, gay people aren’t any better off than they were four years ago.”
Democratic National Convention (Blade photo by Michael Key)
State Department
State Department implements anti-trans bathroom policy
Memo notes directive corresponds with White House executive order
The State Department on April 20 announced employees cannot use bathrooms that correspond with their gender identity.
The Daily Signal, a conservative news website, reported the State Department announced the new policy in a memo titled “Updates Regarding Biological Sex and Intimate Spaces, Including Restrooms.”
The State Department has not responded to the Washington Blade’s request for comment on the directive.
“The administration affirms that there are two sexes — male and female — and that federal facilities should operate on this objective and longstanding basis to ensure consistency, privacy, and safety in shared spaces,” State Department spokesperson Tommy Piggot told the Daily Signal. “In line with President Trump’s executive order this provides clear, uniform guidance to the department by grounding policy in biological sex as determined at birth.”
President Donald Trump shortly after he took office in January 2025 issued an executive order that directed the federal government to only recognize two genders: male and female. The sweeping directive also ordered federal government agencies to “effectuate this policy by taking appropriate action to ensure that intimate spaces designated for women, girls, or females (or for men, boys, or males) are designated by sex and not identity.”
The Daily Signal notes the new State Department policy “does not prohibit single-occupancy restrooms.”
National
I’m telling the scared little girl I once was it’s okay to feel free
This week is Lesbian Visibility Week
Uncloseted Media published this article on April 23.
By SOPHIE HOLLAND | At 13 years old, I remember looking in the mirror in my Toronto bathroom and thinking, “Yeah, I’m a lesbian.” At the time, I thought it was a dirty word. Thinking back, it could be because the first time I heard it was when a family member said, “I don’t know what a lesbian is, they are like aliens.”
And although I walked around in camouflage Crocs with a rainbow My Little Pony charm, plaid knee-length shorts and a shark tooth necklace (yes, these are all, in my opinion, stereotypically lesbian apparel!), I didn’t feel like I fit the mold. The longer I thought about it, the worse I felt, so I buried my feelings deep inside.
Now I am 25, and I have been out since I was 22. Three years ago, I never could have imagined that I’d be working for a queer news publication and celebrating Lesbian Visibility Week, an annual event meant to honor and uplift lesbian perspectives and highlight the hardships our community faces. To me, LVW is so important because, frankly, it has been an absolute shit show getting here, to a place where I feel love and joy most days.
I think back to the frustration of constantly being asked, “Do you have a boyfriend?” Of watching princess movies and seeing a broken girl only find herself when her prince charming arrives. I remember listening to music that was always about heterosexual relationships. I remember feeling left out in high school when, one by one, my friends got boyfriends.
I tried the boyfriend, and I tried really hard for it to work at a large detriment to my wellbeing. I brainwashed myself into thinking I was probably bisexual, which I told my closest friends around 16 and unsuccessfully told my parents at the same age. I was probably subconsciously using this as a litmus test of their acceptance and to soothe the anxiety I felt around my sexuality.
Learning to love who I am did not only come from me unraveling my internalized lesbophobia and dissecting the oppressive societal messages of heteronormativity. It came from meeting an awesome community of lesbians and queers. I found people who understood my worldview and who showed me the ropes. I no longer had to stutter over concepts like lesbian loneliness or my frustration with misogynistic straight men.
They all just got it.
Without this community, I am not sure if I could be as warm and confident in myself as I am today.
And while I still experience homophobia, like being spat on while walking with an ex in downtown Toronto or having a stranger yell in my face “Are you fucking lesbians?” in Kensington Market, the joy and love still outweighs the nasty.
So, as the sentimental dyke that I have become, I decided to ask a set of lesbians in my orbit — including my friends as well as Uncloseted staffers, board members and followers — if they would share a little bit about what makes them love being a lesbian. And now, I can share it with all of you. Here they are. Happy LVW!
Timi Sotire
Falling in love with her was a reset. I felt like a kid again, hopeful about the future. We’ve had to overcome many obstacles to be together, but I’d choose her in every lifetime. I was sick with a long-term health condition when we met, and hanging out with Sophia really helped me with my recovery after my surgery.
Bella Sayegh
Being a lesbian is one of the most beautiful things in the world. To be authentically yourself in resistance and joy is so special within the lesbian community.
Parker Wales
When I met Liv, I finally understood why almost every song is about love.
Gillian Kilgour
There is no connection quite as perfect as between lesbians, no one sees me like my lesbians do.
Chyna Price
There’s many things I love about being a lesbian. But here are my top three:
- There’s just a deeper understanding when it comes to being loved by another woman.
- The next one would be the sense of community, especially being a POC masculine-presenting lesbian. I don’t feel like I’m cosplaying as someone else like I felt like I was doing before I came out.
- There’s so much history going back to the 1800s on how we found and fought for our love. That fight makes me proud because it shows me … that we’ve [found] ways to express our love even when it was misunderstood, illegal and deemed as madness.
Hope Pisoni
Before I knew I was a lesbian, romantic relationships seemed suffocating — it felt like everyone would expect me to act my part in the meticulous performance that is heterosexuality. But meeting my spouse and discovering our identities together showed me just how freeing it could be to love without a script to follow.
Leital Molad
It was the joy of watching the New York Sirens defeat the Toronto Sceptres at our first professional women’s hockey game — surrounded by hundreds (maybe thousands?) of cheering lesbians.
Angela Earl
I spent years building a life that looked right. But I never felt settled, and eventually I started asking what would actually make me happy. Coming out was about more than who I love, it was letting go of everything I was told to be. The last few years have felt like coming home to a life that had been waiting for me.
Tali Bray
What I love about being a lesbian is what I love about being in love … the wonder and joy of “oh, this is what it’s supposed to feel like.” I love moving through the world with women.
Izzy Stokes
I didn’t fall in love until I realized that queerness was an option. My queer friends have helped me see so much more than I grew up seeing. I’m so proud of us, and I’m so grateful for my lesbian community.
Nandika Chatterjee
When I met my fiancée is when I started to feel most like myself. That meant loving myself for who I am and embracing my identity as a lesbian. I felt free in a way I have never before. That’s the long and short of it.
Liz Lucking
The love and joy of being a lesbian is getting to live the life I dreamed of but never thought I would get to have!
Reflections
As I read these beautiful entries, it’s not lost on me that we’re still living in a world where lesbians are more likely to struggle with maternity problems, fetishization, and compulsory heterosexuality — not to mention the intersectional pressures of racism from both inside and outside the queer community. That’s part of why, according to a 2024 survey, 22 percent of LGBTQ women have attempted suicide, and 66 percent have sought treatment for trauma.
So if you are a lesbian who isn’t out or doesn’t feel safe, I hope you read this and can glean some hope from these messages. So when you look in the mirror, you know that it’s okay to release the weight — which can feel so heavy — of a heteronormative world.
We still have a long fight until all lesbians can feel safe to be themselves, but this is a community that does not back away from the tough, from the joy, from being loud and from all the other things that it takes to start a small revolution.
Hell yeah, lesbians! Here’s to you.
*I am signing off with my cat on my lap and a pride flag over my head <3.
Cuba
Trans parent charged with kidnapping, allegedly fled to Cuba with child
Cuban authorities helped locate Rose Inessa-Ethington
Federal authorities have charged a transgender woman with kidnapping after she allegedly fled to Cuba with her 10-year-old child.
An affidavit that Federal Bureau of Investigation Special Agent Jennifer Waterfield filed in U.S. District Court for the District of Utah on April 16 notes the child is a “biological male who identifies as a female” and “splits time living with divorced parents who share custody” in Cache County, Utah.
Waterfield notes the child on March 28 “was supposed to be traveling by car to” Calgary, Alberta, “for a planned camping trip with his transgender mother, Rose Inessa-Ethington, Rose’s partner, Blue Inessa-Ethington, and Blue’s 3-year-old child.”
The affidavit notes the group instead flew from Vancouver, British Columbia, to Mexico City on March 29. Waterfield writes the Inessa-Ethingtons and the two children then flew from Mérida, Mexico, to Havana on April 1.
The 10-year-old child called her biological mother on March 28 after they arrived in Canada. The custody agreement, according to the affidavit, required Rose Inessa-Ethington to return the child to her former spouse on April 3.
“Interviews of MV [Minor Victim] 1’s family members provided significant concerns for MV 1’s well-being, as MV 1 was born a male, however, identifies as a female child, which is largely believed to be due to manipulation by Rose Inessa-Ethington,” reads the affidavit. “Concerns exist that MV 1 was transported to Cuba for gender reassignment surgery prior to puberty.”
The affidavit indicates authorities found a note in the Inessa-Ethingtons’ home with “instruction from a mental health therapist located in Washington, D.C., including instruction to send the therapist the $10,000.00 and instructions on gender-affirming medical care for children.”
The affidavit does not identify the specific “mental health therapist” in D.C.
A Utah judge on April 13 ordered Rose Inessa-Ethington to “immediately” return the child to her former spouse. The former spouse also received sole custody.
“Your affiant believes that due to the extensive planning and preparation exhibited by both Rose Inessa-Ethington and Blue Inessa-Ethington to isolate MV 1 and take MV 1 to Havana, Cuba, without notifying or requesting permission from MV 1’s mother indicates they are likely not planning to return to the United States,” wrote Waterfield.
The affidavit notes Cuban authorities found the Inessa-Ethingtons and the child.
A press release the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the District of Utah issued notes the Inessa-Ethingtons “were deported from Cuba” on Monday “with the assistance of the FBI.”
The couple has been charged with International Parental Kidnapping. The Inessa-Ethingtons were arraigned in Richmond, Va., on Monday. The press release notes a federal court in Salt Lake City will soon handle the case.
The New York Times reported the child is now back with their biological mother.
“We are grateful to law enforcement for working swiftly to return the child to the biological mother,” said First Assistant U.S. Attorney Melissa Holyoak of the District of Utah in the press release.
The case is unfolding against the backdrop of increased tensions between Washington and Havana after U.S. forces on Jan. 3 seized now former Venezuelan President Nicolás Maduro and his wife, Cilia Flores.
President Donald Trump shortly after he took office in January 2025 issued an executive order that directed the federal government to only recognize two genders: male and female. A second White House directive banned federally-funded gender-affirming care for anyone under 19.
The U.S. Supreme Court last year in the Skrmetti decision upheld a Tennessee law that bans gender-affirming care for minors.
Cuba’s national health care system has offered free sex-reassignment surgeries since 2008.
Activists who are critical of Mariela Castro, the daughter of former President Raúl Castro who spearheads LGBTQ issues as director of Cuba’s National Center for Sexual Education, have previously told the Washington Blade that access to these procedures is limited. The Blade on Wednesday asked a contact in Havana to clarify whether Cuban law currently allows minors to undergo sex-reassignment surgery.
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