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Obituary

Gay sports activist Phil Sheats dies

Promoted LGBT soccer events in the U.S., abroad

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Phil Sheats, obituary, gay news, Washington Blade
Phil Sheats, obituary, gay news, Washington Blade

Phil Sheats

Philip Francis ā€œPhilā€ Sheats Jr., a marketing manager forĀ technology companies in the D.C. and Boston areas since the 1990s and a soccer player who participated in and promoted amateur and LGBT soccer events in the U.S. and abroad, died Feb. 7 at his residence in Boston. He was 43.

A spokesperson for the Boston Medical Examiner’s office said tests related to an autopsy seeking to determine the cause of death were incomplete, but a friend said authorities indicated the death appeared to be from natural causes.

An outpouring of comments on Sheats’ personal Facebook page and a separate Facebook page he created for a South Boston LGBT social group he founded called The New Southie portray him as a talented and admired friend and community organizer. Some of those who submitted comments praised him for using his marketing skills to help others, including several gay and non-gay charitable organizations.

ā€œWhether at work or play, Phil will always be remembered for his smile,ā€ said his longtime friend Kevin McDuffie of D.C.

Sheats was born in Washington, D.C. and raised in the Annapolis, Md., area, where he graduated from Broadneck High School in Annapolis in 1987. He attended the University of Maryland in College Park and later Northeastern University, where he graduated with a degree in marketing and a minor in psychology.

According to information about his work history posted on his LinkedIn page, Sheats began his career in marketing-related positions for computer software and technology companies in the D.C. metropolitan area, including suburban Maryland and Northern Virginia.

He later moved to Boston, where he worked for the high tech firms Legato Systems and EMC. His most recent position was that of senior manager for field marketing programs for the Cambridge, Mass., based firm Pegasystems.

McDuffie said Sheats was an ā€œavid music aficionadoā€ who spent some of his leisure time listening to and assembling his own mix of music, which he transferred to CDs and often gave to friends as gifts.

ā€œCDs from Phil were cherished and collected,ā€ McDuffie said.

But among Sheats’ passions was soccer, according to people who knew him.

ā€œPhil was heavily involved in playing soccer at amateur events around the world, in locations such as London, Buenos Aires and Perth, Australia,ā€ said McDuffie.

Sheats won a medal at the 1994 international Gay Games competition in New York. He later became the soccer marketing and press director for the International Gay and Lesbian Football (soccer) Association.

According to a March 2011 article in the Boston Globe, Sheats became the hub of a large social network in Boston’s gay community after founding The New Southie in 2008. ā€œSouthieā€ is a well-known term in Boston referring to a resident of the working-class, predominantly Irish Catholic neighborhood of South Boston, which in the past hasn’t been known as being friendly to the LGBT community.

Sheats told the Globe he initially created The New Southie as a Facebook group to help him meet other gays in South Boston at the time he moved there. He said he later decided to bring the group ā€œoff the Internet and into the real worldā€ by organizing events at neighborhood bars, the Globe reported.

McDuffie said the group quickly mushroomed into a popular venue that brought hundreds of people to South Boston bars and restaurants on nights where business was normally slow. He said Sheats charged an admission fee for some of the events, and used the proceeds to make donations to charitable groups such as the Trevor Project, an LGBT group that works to prevent suicide among LGBT youth.

ā€œThe membership eventually grew to over 1,000,ā€ McDuffie said of The New Southie.

Sheats has been credited with playing a key role in breaking down barriers between gays and straights in South Boston through his event organizing.

He was known for his ā€œengaging personalityā€ and sometimes for his ā€œlighthearted trouble-making mischievousness,ā€ McDuffie said. ā€œThe side most people know and love about him was his great comedic timing, a master creator of nicknames for his family and friends – always loved but not always flattering. Having a nickname from Phil meant you had made it in his heart and life.ā€

He is survived by his mother, Mary Sheats of Arnold, Md.; his father, Phil Sheats and stepmother Marianne Sheats of Newport Beach, Calif.; his brother William Sheats of Arnold, Md.; and three sisters, Christine Zoellner of Annapolis, Carole Sheats of West Virginia, and Kathleen Sheats of Arnold; three nephews and many friends.

Friends are invited to a funeral mass scheduled for 9 a.m. Monday, Feb. 18, at St. Andrew by the Bay Catholic Church in Annapolis. A burial is scheduled following the mass at 10:30 a.m. at Lakemont Memorial Gardens cemetery in Davidsonville, Md. A Celebration of Life is scheduled after the burial from 11:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. at Yellowfins Restaurant at 2840 Solomon’s Island Rd. in Edgewater, Md.

Memorial contributions can be made to the Trevor Project at thetrevorproject.org/MemorialandTribute.

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Obituary

Local attorney, LGBTQ rights advocate Dale Sanders dies at 75

Acclaimed lawyer credited with advancing legal rights for people with HIV/AIDS

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Dale Edwin Sanders (Photo courtesy of the family)

Dale Edwin Sanders, an attorney who practiced law in D.C. and Northern Virginia for more than 40 years and is credited with playing a key role in providing legal services for people living with HIV/AIDS beginning in the early 1980s, died April 10 at the age of 75.

His brother, Wade Sanders, said the cause of death was a heart attack that occurred at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore shortly after he had back surgery.

Wade Sanders described his brother as a ā€œtrial lawyer, passionate criminal defense, and civil litigator for  human rightsā€ for close to 50 years, with some of his work focused on ā€œcivil law, notably gay-related insurance discrimination during the AIDS epidemic.ā€

He called his brother ā€œa zealous advocate for the oppressed, his clients, and his personal convictions.ā€

Born in Arlington, Va., and raised in McLean, Va., Dale Sanders graduated from Langley High School in McLean and receivedĀ his bachelor’s degree from the University of Virginia, his brother said. He received his law degree from D.C.’s American UniversityĀ Washington College of Law and began his law practice in 1976 in Old Town, Alexandria, Wade Sanders said.

Amy Nelson, director of Legal Services for D.C. ‘s Whitman-Walker Health, said Sanders became one of Whitman-Walker’s original volunteer pro-bono attorneys in the 1980s.

ā€œDale was a beloved part of the legal services program and our medical-legal partnership for nearly 40 years,ā€ Nelson said. ā€œDale was one of the clinic’s first volunteer attorneys at Whitman-Walker’s weekly, legal walk-in clinic offering free counseling to clients about their legal rights in the face of HIV/AIDS and LGBT discrimination from employers, landlords, medical providers, and insurance companies,ā€ according to Nelson.

Nelson added, ā€œDale represented dozens of people impacted by the ignorance and prejudice attendant to an HIV/AIDS diagnosis, and his litigation wins were instrumental in advancing the legal rights of persons living with HIV/AIDS.ā€

Sanders’s most recent case on behalf of Whitman-Walker took place in 2023 in support of a transgender woman in Virginia who faced discrimination from her employer and health insurer, Nelson said.

In 1989, Whitman-Walker presented Sanders with its Gene Frey Award for Volunteer Service, and in 1994 presented him with its Founders Award for Pro Bono Legal Services, Nelson told the Blade. She said in 2024, Whitman-Walker re-named its annual Going the Extra Mile Pro Bono Award as the Dale Sanders Award for Pro Bono Excellence.

ā€œDale’s legacy helped to shape HIV/AIDS law, and his fierce commitment to justice will live on at Whitman-Walker Health,ā€ Nelson said in a statement. ā€œWe will miss him dearly.ā€ 

Daniel Bruner, who served as Whitman-Walker’s legal services director prior to Amy Nelson taking that position, said Sanders played a role in shaping his own legal skills and knowledge.

ā€œDale was one of my earliest legal models among local, and national, advocates for people living with HIV and LGBT people,ā€ Bruner told the Blade. ā€œHe was a fierce, persistent advocate for his clients and for the community,ā€ Bruner said, adding, ā€œHe won key victories in several cases where employees’ or health care patients’ privacy had been egregiously violated. I certainly will never forget him.ā€

Wade Sanders said his brother was also an avid bridge player, saying he played competitively. ā€œHe earned the rank of Ruby Life Master, a pretty big deal in the bridge world,ā€ Wade Sanders said.

Dale Sanders is survived by his husband, Christian Samonte; his sister, Joyce Sanders of York, S.C.; his brotherĀ Wade Sanders of West Jefferson, N.C.; and his beloved dogs Langley and Abigail, his brother said in a statement.

A memorial service for Dale Sanders organized by the Sanders family and the LGBTQ Catholic group Dignity Washington will be held Saturday, May 10, at 1 p.m. at St. Margaret’s Episcopal Church at 1830 Connecticut Ave., N.W. in D.C., a Dignity Washington spokesperson said.Ā 

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Obituary

Nanette Kazaoka, an unlikely AIDS activist, dies at 83

Member of ACT-UP, longtime social justice advocate

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Nanette Kazaoka (Photo courtesy the family)

Nanette Kazaoka, a well-known figure in the fight for HIV/AIDS awareness and the rights of marginalized communities, passed away on Oct. 2 at her home in New York City. She was 83. The cause of death was complications from vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s disease, according to a statement from her daughter Kelly Kochendorfer.

Kazaoka was an advocate for justice, particularly in the early days of the AIDS crisis, when she became a member of the AIDS Coalition to Unleash Power, or ACT-Up. She is perhaps best remembered for her participation in a 2004 protest in front of Madison Square Garden during the Republican National Convention, when she and 11 fellow activists staged a dramatic naked demonstration, demanding debt cancellation for impoverished countries, according to a statement from the family. 

ā€œBush, Stop AIDS. Drop the Debt Now!ā€ they chanted, with slogans stenciled in black paint on their bodies. The bold protest drew national attention and underscored the urgency of global debt relief as a key element in the fight against AIDS.

She was born Nanette Natalina Bottinelli on June 12, 1941, in New York City. Her father, Angelo, worked as a waiter at the St. Regis Hotel, while her mother, Betty McComb, was a part-time burlesque dancer. 

She married her first husband, Fred Kochendorfer, in 1963, and they had two children together, Kim Skrobe and Kelly, both of whom survive her. 

Kazaoka’s journey to Fire Island marked a transformative period in her life. Kochendorfer wanted to live there, and so they began renting in 1967. Kazaoka then made a bold decision that would shape her future: She left her husband for another man and began living on Fire Island in 1968-1969, with the children attending school in Ocean Beach, according to the family’s statement.

This period coincided with the early days of the gay rights movement, as Fire Island was emerging as a hub for LGBTQ culture. Her experiences during these years contributed to the strong sense of activism and solidarity that would later define her role in ACT-UP and the broader fight for LGBTQ rights.

Kazaoka’s second husband, Katsushiga “Kats” Kazaoka, a Japanese-American psychologist who had been interred during World War II, died of cancer in 1984, pushing her to enter the workforce as a receptionist while studying occupational therapy at Downstate Medical Center. By 1990, she had earned her degree and sought work with AIDS patients.

In 1988, a close friend introduced her to ACT-UP, sparking the start of her full-time dedication to AIDS activism, the family said. Kazaoka became known for her passionate, unrelenting activism, whether protesting at City Hall or challenging anti-LGBTQ policies at St. Luke’s Hospital.

Kazaoka’s activism spanned 35 years, making her a beloved and respected figure within ACT-UP and beyond, the family noted. She was featured in Sarah Schulman’s “Let the Record Show: A Political History of ACT-Up New York, 1987-1993” as well as “Act-Up Oral History, No. 162,ā€ a digital history. She was the cover photo of “Fag Hags, Divas and Moms: The Legacy of Straight Women in the AIDS Community,” and was included in The New York Times T Living Magazine story, “LEGENDS PIONEERS AND SURVIVORS.

Her dedication to science continued even after her passing: She donated her brain to the Mount Sinai NIH Brain and Tissue Repository for research to advance the understanding of the human brain health and disease to help end dementia, the family said.

Along with her daughters, Kazaoka is survived by her son-in-law John Skrobe, granddaughter Stella Skrobe and daughter-in-law Christine Arax, all of New York. She and her third husband, Paul Haskell, divorced in 2000. 

Nanette Kazaoka marches in an ACT UP action in the 1990s. (Photo courtesy the family)
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D.C. LGBTQ rights advocate Jeri Hughes dies at 73

ā€˜Force of nature’ credited with pro-trans policy at city jail

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Jeri Hughes (Washington Blade photo by Pete Exis)

Jeri Hughes, a longtime D.C. transgender rights advocate who has worked closely with activists in support of the local LGBTQ community, died March 18 at her home after a seven-year battle with lung cancer. She was 73.

Hughes, who has worked for the past 11 years at the D.C. Department of Employment Services, most recently as a Workforce Development Specialist, became involved in local LGBTQ rights and transgender rights endeavors since she moved to D.C. around 2005.

Among other endeavors, Hughes, along with D.C. transgender rights advocate Earline Budd, has served for more than a decade on the D.C. Department of Corrections’ Transgender Housing and Transgender Advisory committees.

Budd this week said Hughes played an important role in ensuring that Department of Corrections officials continue to follow a 2009 policy of allowing transgender inmates to choose whether to be placed in the men’s or the women’s housing units at the D.C. jail.

ā€œIn her toughness and determination, Jeri was a force of nature,ā€ said Rick Rosendall, former president of the D.C. Gay and Lesbian Activists Alliance. ā€œShe pressed the D.C. Department of Corrections for more humane and respectful treatment of transgender inmates,ā€ Rosendall said.

ā€œShe pressed the D.C. government to set an example by hiring more trans people,ā€ according to Rosendall, who added that Hughes interacted with D.C. police officials, including former D.C. Police Chief Peter Newsham, to push for respectful treatment of trans people by the police.

Hughes’s LinkedIn page shows that prior to working at the D.C. Department of Employment Services she served as housing coordinator for a local social services organization called T.H.E. Inc., where, among other things, she ā€œmonitored and mentored a diverse population of LGBT youth.ā€

Her LinkedIn page shows she also worked from June 2009 to May 2010 as an administrative assistant at the D.C. Anacostia Watershed Society.

Hughes’s brother, Lou Hughes, who said the Hughes family is originally from Ohio, told the Washington Blade Jeri Hughes served in the U.S. Navy after high school as a torpedo operator in a submarine in the South Pacific. He said a short time later Jeri Hughes moved to New York City, where she operated a company that provided commercial laundry service to restaurants and hospitals.

Lou Hughes said his sister Jeri moved to D.C. around 2005 and initially lived with him and his wife in a basement apartment in their house before moving to her own apartment in Northwest D.C. where she remained until her passing.

He said it was around 2005 that his sister informed her family that she planned to transition as a transgender woman at the age of 54. ā€œAnd our family fully supported her decision, helped her finance the various surgeries,ā€ Lou Hughes said. ā€œAnd once she went through the transition it was like she was fully reborn.ā€

ā€œAnd that’s why all these negative comments about transgender people right now – it’s very hurtful to our family because she was really the classic transgender person who was really simply born in the wrong body and gave our entire family a real sensitivity and understanding of what that meant,ā€ Lou Hughes said.

Denise Leclair, one of Jeri Hughes’s closest friends and former roommate, said among Jeri Hughes’s many interests was boating. Leclair said Hughes persuaded her to join Hughes in purchasing a 45-foot sailboat in 2019, shortly after Hughes was diagnosed with lung cancer.

ā€œWe spent the next two months getting it fixed up and we started sailing,ā€ Leclair recalls. ā€œAnd we did quite a bit of sailing, so she really put her heart and soul into restoring this boat.ā€

Leclair said the boat was docked in a harbor in Deale, Md., just south of Annapolis. She said up until a few months ago, after her cancer prevented her from working full-time, Hughes spent most of her time living on the boat until her illness forced her to return to her D.C. apartment.

ā€œMy Dearest Sister Jeri, born April 30, 1951, left our restless Earth in the early morning of March 18, 2025, succumbing to the lung cancer which she battled against so bravely for seven years,ā€  Lou Hughes says in a statement. ā€œAs we all know, Jeri was a person of high intellect, incredible energy and fearless in the face of adversity,ā€ her brother wrote.

ā€œWhether through acts of quiet charity, tireless advocacy, or simply offering a listening ear, Jeri made it a mission to uplift, support, and care for every person she encountered,ā€  his statement says. “Her life was a testament to empathy in action, leaving a lasting legacy of love, hope, and selflessness that will continue to inspire all who knew her.ā€

In addition to her many friends and colleagues in D.C., Jeri Hughes is survived by her brother, Lou Hughes; sister-In-law Candice Hughes; daughter, Casey Martin; son-in-law Wally Martin; grandson Liam Martin; granddaughter, Mirella Martin; niece, Brittany Hughes; and nephew Klaus Meierdiercks.

A memorial service and celebration of life for Jeri Hughes is scheduled to be held May 10 at D.C.’s Metropolitan Community Church at 1 p.m., according to Earline Budd.

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