Arts & Entertainment
The power of two
Brother/sister duo K’s Choice reunite for U.S. tour

K’s Choice — brother-sister duo Sarah and Gert Bettens — are back with their first album in eight years. (Photo by Frank Clauwers; courtesy Think Press)
K’s Choice
With A Fragile Tomorrow
Wednesday
8 p.m.
$20
Ram’s Head on Stage
33 West St.
Annapolis, Md.
Ramsheadonstage.com
It’s an exciting time for K’s Choice fans. The brother/sister alt rock band that came to international fame in the ‘90s with hits like “Not an Addict,” “Believe” and “Almost Happy” while touring with Alanis Morissette and the Indigo Girls, are back with the U.S. release of their first album in a decade, “Echo Mountain.”
Though released abroad in 2010, “Mountain” and its acoustic companion “Little Echoes” are available stateside this month to coincide with a U.S. tour that kicks off next week in Tennessee. On Tuesday they play Ram’s Head Live in Annapolis.
During an interview last week, Sarah Bettens, who co-fronts the native Belgian band with her brother Gert, spoke to the Blade from her home in Johnson City, Tenn., (about four hours from Nashville) where she moved to be with her partner 10 years ago about the time K’s Choice opted for a long hiatus.
“It’s near the North Carolina/Virginia border,” she says, admitting it’s a much different place to live than her native Belgium where most of her family still resides “within about a 15-mile radius.”
“Yes, it is a lot different, but that being said, it has changed a lot in the last 10 years. There was just an article in the local newspaper about two guys looking to adopt. It was on the front page and I remember thinking, ‘Ten years ago, this would never have been in the local newspaper.’ Some, I’m sure, were offended by it, but more and more, they’re in the minority. People seem to care less and less. … It was an adjustment at first, but everywhere you go, you’re able to find like-minded people. We have good friends here and we’re happy.”
Of the four kids Bettens and her partner are raising, she says they’re, “actually very respectful” of her music.
“It’s always a bit of a surprise that they’re respectful about anything at that age, but when I play locally, which is only maybe once every two years, they come and feel proud.”
Sarah and Gert have one older brother. She says he’s “a music lover, but not musically inclined.” She says he’s always been supportive of K’s Choice, whose hiatus, she says, was “a very conscious thing.”
In the time between the last K’s Choice album, “Almost Happy,” in 2000, Bettens, 40, has released three solo albums and an EP and has also contributed her husky, haunting vocals to several movie soundtracks. Gert, 43, also did solo work in the meantime.
“We always said one day we’d get back together when we were ready and we knew it would be great fun, but we also considered the hiatus a true hiatus,” she says. “We needed to work with some other people, do some other things. We’d never really worked with anybody else because we’d kind of grown up in our own band so that kinda kept us from experiences with other musicians. That just had always been the way it was right from the beginning, so it was healthy and fun for us to go our own ways for awhile.”
Bettens’ U.S. residency did make for a few slight challenges when it came time to reunite for “Echo Mountain,” which has earned strong reviews with All Music Guide calling it a “simple but mature and filler-free alt-rock album” that’s more “nostalgic” and “downright fun” than “angsty.”
“For a long time, I would only see him when I was doing my solo tours,” she says. “We sent some MP3s back and forth but eventually we did have to sit down in the same room and decide what kind of record we wanted to make. It was very hard to get direction until we did that.”
Bettens says there’s not ordinarily a huge distinction between the songs she writes for her solo projects and K’s Choice material though the material for her first solo album — around the time she came out as a lesbian in the early ‘00s — was more personal than K’s Choice material had typically been.
She came out to her family “as soon as I was out to myself,” but waited to come out publicly.
“I didn’t wait around with a big secret for years and years,” she says. “I just kind of discovered it myself, for some reason I haven’t fully figured out yet, at a very late age. I was 28. Looking back, I really wonder why I didn’t see the 25,000 signs there were from the age of 5. But for some reason it took me til age 28 to fully figure it out. I didn’t come out to the rest of the world right away, not because I was scared of some backlash, but I knew I would quickly become some sort of spokesperson and I really felt I had nothing much to say about it yet. It was all so new to me that I didn’t want to have to speak for the gay community. I didn’t think I had anything interesting to share.”
Being outed in a magazine shortly thereafter was “fine,” she says.
“It was probably supposed to happen that way,” she says. “It was good to show young people that lesbians are normal people too.”
SIDEBAR:
5 quick music questions with Sarah Bettens
WASHINGTON BLADE: Alt rock lyrics, especially in the ‘90s, are known to be sort of vague and oblique. Do you think about how direct you’re being when writing lyrics?
SARAH BETTENS: No, I don’t give it any thought when I’m writing. Afterwards, my brother and I laugh about how different our lyrics are. It’s a much more roundabout trip to get to the bottom of his lyrics I think.
BLADE: Your pitch always seems so dead on. When you’ve been singing professionally for many years, does that eventually become something that happens naturally or are you always thinking on some level about whether your pitch is right?
BETTENS: Sometimes when we listen back to, say, a three-part harmony, we will notice things like places where we tend to go a little flat every time so we know to watch out for it. Sometimes you listen back to a recording of a live show where you think you did a fantastic job and it’s a little disappointing because it always sounds more perfect the way you remember it in your head, which isn’t always the reality. And we do notice things in rehearsal, like, “OK, we tend to go flat here, we need to be careful of that.” I find simply looking up in those passages is helpful for tone.
BLADE: Having started your career before the Internet became really widespread, all things considered, has it been more of a blessing or curse for your music career?
BETTENS: There are obvious downsides. Everybody has lost money and record companies have gotten smaller and really struggled. We started right before that when everybody still had money so Sony was giving us big dinners and there was lots of money to record, a big budget for touring. That’s unheard of anymore. When we toured with Alanis, Sony gave us a tour bus, money to pay our musicians. Stuff like that today, at least on our level, is unheard of. … And it’s getting very hard for a band like us to get on the radio but even so, no matter how small you are or how dire the outlook, there’s always the chance that something will get discovered on the Internet. There’s always that hope. So to say it’s been a totally negative thing would be exaggerating. But for sure, we’ve lost money by not selling records. We’ll play some crazy sold out show in someplace like Israel where we’ve never been before and people will be singing along to every word and we know we haven’t even sold 2,000 albums altogether in Israel so you think, “How do they know all these songs so well?” It makes for pleasant surprises but it’s also a little disturbing too.
Out & About
Learn more about queer love
Friends of Dorothy Cafe hosts event at City-State Public House
Friends of Dorothy Cafe will host “Living History: How We Loved” on Thursday, May 14 at 7:30 p.m. at City-State Public House.
Guests will hear how queer and trans people have loved and cared for one another, especially when legal, medical, and social systems did not recognize those relationships. We’ll reflect on chosen family, long-term partnerships before marriage equality, caregiving during the AIDS crisis, hidden romances, friendship as survival, chosen family, and the loves that changed the course of our lives. This evening is about honoring lived experience, preserving community memory, and strengthening the bridge between generations.
Tickets are $24.57 and are available on Eventbrite.
Friday, May 8
Center Aging Monthly Luncheon With Yoga will be at noon at the DC Center for the LGBT Community. Email Mac at [email protected] if you require ASL interpreter assistance, have any dietary restrictions, or questions about this event.
Women in their Twenties and Thirties will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This is a social discussion group for queer women in the Washington, D.C. area. For more details, visit the group’s Facebook.
The DC Center for the LGBT Community will host “We Are Pat” at 12:30 p.m. This event takes a fresh look at the iconic Saturday Night Live sketch “It’s Pat” and traces how ideas about gender and what we laugh at have shifted from the ’90s to today. What began as a character born out of cultural anxiety around gender now lands in a world shaped by ongoing debates about transness and queerness. For more details, visit the DC Center’s website.
Saturday, May 9
Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Brunch” at 11 a.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant. This fun weekly event brings the DMV area LGBTQ community, including allies, together for delicious food and conversation. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.
Sunday, May 10
Drag Queen Sip and Paint Experience Washington DC will be at 4 p.m. at Town Tavern. This is a fabulous experience brought to you by Sip and Paint USA and combines the joy of painting with the lively energy of a drag queen, offering an hour and a half of fun, creativity, and entertainment. Participants paint a canvas while enjoying cocktails, all under the guidance of a glamorous drag queen host. Tickets are $47.19 and can be purchased on Eventbrite.
Monday, May 11
Center Aging: Monday Coffee Klatch” will be at 10 a.m. on Zoom. This is a social hour for older LGBTQ adults. Guests are encouraged to bring a beverage of choice. For more information, contact Adam ([email protected]).
Genderqueer DC will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This is a support group for people who identify outside of the gender binary, whether you’re bigender, agender, genderfluid, or just know that you’re not 100% cis. For more details, visit genderqueerdc.org or Facebook.
Tuesday, May 12
Trans Discussion Group will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This event is intended to provide an emotionally and physically safe space for trans* people and those who may be questioning their gender identity/expression to join together in community and learn from one another. For more details, email [email protected].
Coming Out Discussion Group will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This is a safe space to share experiences about coming out and discuss topics as it relates to doing so — by sharing struggles and victories the group allows those newly coming out and who have been out for a while to learn from others. For more details, visit the group’s Facebook.
Wednesday, May 13
Job Club will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom upon request. This is a weekly job support program to help job entrants and seekers, including the long-term unemployed, improve self-confidence, motivation, resilience and productivity for effective job searches and networking — allowing participants to move away from being merely “applicants” toward being “candidates.” For more information, email [email protected] or visit thedccenter.org/careers.
The DC Center for the LGBT Community will host “Movement for Healing” at 3 p.m. This trauma- and yoga therapy–informed class is designed to help guests gently reconnect with their body and their breath. Through mindful movement, somatic awareness, and grounding practices, guests will explore how to release tension, increase mobility, and cultivate a deeper sense of safety and ease within. For more details, visit the DC Center’s website.
Thursday, May 14
Virtual Yoga Class will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This free weekly class is a combination of yoga, breathwork and meditation that allows LGBTQ+ community members to continue their healing journey with somatic and mindfulness practices. For more details, visit the DC Center’s website.
Television
Repression, toxic masculinity fuel intense queer drama ‘Half Man’
A solidly crafted, well-acted, fascinating binge watch
In 2024, when Richard Gadd’s “Baby Reindeer” became a stock-boosting hit for Netflix, there were few Americans who knew his name.
In the UK, however, the Scottish writer/comedian/actor had already emerged as a talent to be reckoned with, blending autobiographical stand-up comedy with theater to create a reputation as an edgy and provocative creator whose shows tended to be equal parts divisive and successful. One of these, his fictionalized true-life story of being stalked and sexually harassed by a female fan, became an Olivier Award-winning hit in the London theater; that was “Baby Reindeer,” and – in the form of a seven-episode miniseries adaptation – it became the vehicle that carried him to wider fame.
Two years later, Gadd has returned with another high-profile miniseries, this time for HBO Max, and like its predecessor, it’s a story that deals with queer sexual repression, unhealthy attachments, and a central relationship that can safely be described without exaggeration as “toxic” – and it’s an even darker (and more twisted) ride that stretches across decades.
“Half Man,” which debuted on April 23 and continues with one episode per week through May 14, is the story of two “brothers” – Niall (Jamie Bell) and Ruben (Gadd) – whose mothers (Neve McIntosh and Marianne McIvor) have become a lesbian couple after leaving their relationships with the boys’ respective fathers. They are seeming opposites in personality; Niall is quiet, sensitive, and secretly unsure about his sexuality, while Ruben is tough, rebellious, and prone to violence – and unsurprisingly, it’s a match made in hell.
We meet them at the top of the first episode as adults, on the day of Niall’s wedding, when Ruben shows up without warning; his appearance triggers what looks like fear in his “brother from another lover,” and a private meeting between them in a barn at the wedding site turns ugly, launching a flashback format that takes us back to their schooldays, when young Ruben (Stuart Campbell) – already in trouble with the law and trying for a new start – comes home from juvenile detention to become roommate, protector, and bully to young Niall (Mitchell Robertson), all in one.
It’s the dawn of a new and epic relationship, despite a history that has made Niall terrified of the older boy; their seemingly opposite qualities somehow mesh into a kind of symbiotic bubble, in which a tense equilibrium turns them into unlikely allies. Ruben makes sure Niall has nothing to fear from the sniggering schoolyard homophobes who target him, and Niall helps Ruben pass the tests he needs to pass in order to stay in school, Nevertheless, their dynamic is equal parts surprisingly tender and alarmingly lopsided. Though they form a bond, it’s a volatile one, and by the end of episode one – after an uncomfortable-to-watch late night incident that amounts to a sexual assault – there is little doubt that Ruben is a psychopath. By then, however, it’s too late; Niall has become hopelessly ensnared by his manipulations, and their dangerous attachment has taken permanent root.
In episode two, the timeline moves the past forward several years (while rolling the wedding-day story back a few hours as well), bringing Niall forward to his college years. Ruben is once again absent from his life, but the bond is still deep. He struggles to make connections in his new setting – including with another student, the openly gay Alby (Bilal Hasna), who recognizes a side of him that he has still yet to accept for himself. Though he gradually begins to adapt to his new social circle, his insecurities get the better of him – and despite warnings from his mother not to do so, he calls Ruben to come and visit. His arrival triggers another escalating series of incidents, this time entangling Niall’s new friends and culminating in a shocking, jealous-fueled explosion of violence.
Without going on with the story – after all, the two remaining episodes have yet to be released, so we wouldn’t want to spoil anything – it’s safe to say there’s a pattern here, and it’s intentional.
Gadd has already been public about his own struggles with repression, which were directly explored (albeit fictionally) in “Baby Reindeer,” and it’s clear that he had more to say about the effects they had on his life and identity.
As he put it himself, in an interview with the Hollywood Reporter, “Themes of, I guess, masculinity, or what it means to be a man, or ‘I’ve gone through a masculinity crisis’ come into [the show] probably because I’ve been through that in my life, and I feel I can write to it and speak to it.
“I always think that the best kind of art is kept close to your chest, kept close to your heart, kept close to your experiences, and I guess with ‘Half Man,’ there’s a lot in it that I relate to. It’s not an autobiographical piece by any stretch, it’s purely fiction, but it certainly borrows from themes and struggles and issues that I understand.”
That understanding translates to the series through its focus on tracing the roots of Niall and Ruben’s relationship by methodically tracking the cause-and-effect chain that links the major events of their lives together. It explores the contradictory combination of worship and terror, the transgressive eroticism that intertwines danger and desire, the power of the forbidden to make us want it more, and the self-loathing that punishes itself through violence toward others. The inverted framework of the storytelling, which works both forward and back to meet at (we assume) some definitive point, makes following it a bit like putting together a puzzle, which also has the effect of building suspense as we wait to see the “moment of truth.”
Of course, those who prefer a more straightforward narrative might not appreciate the additional challenge, especially when the subject matter – which revolves around experiences, feelings, and behavior that might be entirely unfamiliar to many audiences – is challenging enough by itself, in its own way. Likewise, and for much the same reason, there will be viewers who are unable to relate to its characters, as some of the show’s less-favorable reviews have pointed out.
But it would be naive to assume that the themes in “Half Man” – of fragile masculinity, internalized homophobia, misdirected rage, nihilistic rebellion, conflicted desires, projected shame, and the other ingredients that infuse this shadow-boxing psychodrama with such a distinctive musky odor – do not apply to more men in today’s culture of incels, “looksmaxxers,” and “the Man-o-sphere” than any of them would like to admit. We’d wager that its portrait of a same-sex, sub/Dom, borderline incestuous relationship might resonate more urgently there than within a queer community that has been grappling with those issues for generations already and are just waiting for everybody else to catch up.
In any case, Gadd’s newest variation on a theme is a solidly crafted, well-acted, and hypnotically fascinating (if sometimes uncomfortable) exercise in the kind of “can’t look away” drama that makes for a perfect binge watch. Or, at least, it will once all the episodes drop.
