Local
Gay couple who met through Blade personal ad marries
Cliff O’Neill and Doug Whiteman exchanged vows in D.C. on Friday
Cliff O’Neill and Doug Whiteman (Photo courtesy of the couple)
A gay Florida couple who met through a Washington Blade personal ad more than two decades ago married in D.C. on Friday.
Cliff O’Neill, a then-reporter who had just moved to the nation’s capital from Florida, placed an ad in the Blade in July 1990 that sought someone who liked “working out, dancing” and “nights huddled in front of a blazing VCR.” Doug Whiteman, who was also a journalist at the time, responded.
The couple had their first date at Food for Thought in Dupont Circle. O’Neill and Whiteman quickly became good friends, but they dated other people before they and an acquaintance took a vacation to Walt Disney World the following year.
“He was a complete jerk the entire time, which sort of brought the two of us together,” O’Neill told the Blade on Thursday. “When we got back, I kind of realized that I’d been sort of kidding myself this whole time that Doug and I really needed to be together. And so then we were.”
The couple lived together in D.C. and Maryland before relocating to Columbus, Ohio, in 2005. They moved to Jupiter, Fla., in 2012.
O’Neill and Whiteman told the Blade they thought they would “eventually” get married in Florida, even though the state’s constitution bans nuptials for gays and lesbians. They said the U.S. Supreme Court decision that found a portion of the Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional and the Internal Revenue Service’s subsequent announcement that it would recognize legally performed same-sex marriages for federal tax purposes changed their plans.
The couple considered exchanging vows in Maryland or in New York where Whiteman once lived, but they eventually settled upon the nation’s capital.
“D.C. has a lot of sentimental meaning of course,” Whiteman said. “It’s where we met.”
Dan Cipullo, director of the D.C. Superior Court’s Criminal Division, officiated the couple’s wedding that took place during a small ceremony in Northwest Washington. Whiteman’s former co-workers and O’Neill’s long-time friend from college served as witnesses.
The couple plans to have a wedding reception in West Palm Beach, Fla., with family and friends once they return to the Sunshine State.
“I’ve never imagined that it’s actually getting to happen for me,” an emotional O’Neill said before the wedding.
“You just get so used to the idea that you can’t get married,” Whiteman added. “The reality of the fact that we can get married and we are getting married hasn’t really sunken in with me yet.”
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The Comings & Goings column also invites LGBTQ college students to share their successes with us. If you have been elected to a student government position, gotten an exciting internship, or are graduating and beginning your career with a great job, let us know so we can share your success.
Congratulations to Yadiel Meléndez, on their new role as Community Associate, with the Wanda Alston Foundation. Meléndez is piloting a new role as a Community Associate at the Wanda Alston Foundation, where they support queer and trans young people in finding their footing, building independence, and experiencing a housing community where they are seen, valued, and affirmed. They are coming into this role with more than a decade of experience as a community organizer and operations specialist, supporting diverse communities through service, advocacy, and program coordination.
Previously they worked for Right Proper Brewing Shaw as a server and bartender and at Sephora, Washington, DC, and at FreshFarm, DC, in bilingual food access. They also worked freelance to build foundational structures for local queer BIPOC performance art coalitions, producing variety shows to curate space for marginalized performance artists in the community. They were a production manager for Haus of Hart Productions, a BIPOC centric performance art production. They also worked as field staff with the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention in Stafford, Va.
Meléndez is bilingual, Spanish and English. Their work is guided by a commitment to dignity, safety, and trauma-informed engagement, particularly within LGBTQ and BIPOC communities.
Congratulations also to Ben Rosen LICSW, on his new role as program director, with the Wanda Alston Foundation. Rosen previously worked with Fountain House’s OnRamps program, helping to build a new, innovative outreach program for individuals considered chronically homeless, and living with serious mental illness, in the Times Square area of New York. Rosen is a Psychotherapist, having worked with SG Psychotherapy, and as the psychotherapist with the Nest Community Health Center (URAM).
Rosen has a B.F.A. in Theatre Arts: Musical Theatre, Minor in Psychology (Cum Laude) from Malloy University Conservatory; and his M.S.W. in Clinical Practice with Individuals, Families, and Groups, from The Silberman School of Social Work, Hunter College, N.Y. He is independently licensed in New York and Washington, D.C.
Rehoboth Beach
BLUF leather social set for April 10 in Rehoboth
Attendees encouraged to wear appropriate gear
Diego’s in Rehoboth Beach hosts a monthly leather happy hour. April’s edition is scheduled for Friday, April 10, 5-7 p.m. Attendees are encouraged to wear appropriate gear. The event is billed as an official event of BLUF, the free community group for men interested in leather. After happy hour, the attendees are encouraged to reconvene at Local Bootlegging Company for dinner, which allows cigar smoking. There’s no cover charge for either event.
District of Columbia
Celebrations of life planned for Sean Bartel
Two memorial events scheduled in D.C.
Two celebrations of life are planned for Sean Christopher Bartel, 48, who was found deceased on a hiking trail in Argentina on or around March 15. Bartel began his career as a television news reporter and news anchor at stations in Louisville, Ky., and Evansville, Ind., before serving as Senior Video Producer for the D.C.-based International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers union from 2013 to 2024.
A memorial gathering is planned for Friday, April 10, 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. at the IBEW International Office (900 7th St., N.W.), according to a statement by the DC Gay Flag Football League, where Bartel was a longtime member. A celebration of life is planned that same evening, 6-8 p.m. at Trade (1410 14th St., N.W.).
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BLUF leather social set for April 10 in Rehoboth
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