Arts & Entertainment
Queery: D’Arcee Charington Neal
The Gay Men’s Chorus baritone answers 20 gay questions
D’Arcee Charington Neal got in the Gay Men’s Chorus by the narrowest of margins.
A friend was auditioning back in August and Neal asked about it. Initially thinking he’d missed the deadline, he double checked the date and realized about 3 p.m. on the final day, he had until 5 to try out, so he did. He had never heard the Chorus or even realized there was such an outfit, but is enjoying his first season with the group. He sings baritone. Next weekend, the group gives three performances of its “Winter Nights” show at Lisner Auditorium (730 21st Street, NW; gmcw.org for details).
Neal is excited for the show.
“It will just be marvelous,” Neal says. “I’ve never really seen anything like it. … It’s everything from Bollywood to West African holiday music to traditional Latin choral arrangements.”
Neal, a 26-year-old Cary, N.C., native, came to Washington in 2007 for an internship. After completing a master’s degree (in creative and professional wiring) at London’s University of Roehampton, he returned to the District mostly because the Metro system makes it easy for him to get around.
“People in D.C. make fun of it, but they really have no idea,” he says. “From a disabled person’s perspective, it’s really the best thing in the U.S. I’ve ridden almost every underground in the country and D.C.’s is by far the best I’ve ever been on.”
Neal is single and lives in College Park, Md. He’s looking for writing work and says his disability has made finding employment difficult. He eventually wants to move into the District.
In his free time, he enjoys writing, cooking, singing and playing Call of Duty.
How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell?
I’ve been out since I was 17, and it was definitely my parents. My mother looked me in my face and said that she wished that I would have gotten AIDS and died so they could’ve mourned me and moved on already. That’s rough. But I know as older black people, they come from a different time. And as a disabled black person, they feel like I already have two strikes on my life, so they think being gay is something else I’m adding to make my life harder. (Editor’s note — Neal’s mother, Katherine Neal e-mailed the Blade and said she never said this.)
Who’s your LGBT hero?
Lady Gaga. Outside of being outrageously talented, I can’t think of anyone who genuinely works for the good of the gays and really believes in what they do, on her level. As a megastar she could be about anything, but she has taken this platform up, and I can’t thank her enough for it.
What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present?
I was a huge fan of club Apex. Coming from Bible Belt North Carolina, it was like this holy megaplex of debauchery. Multiple floors of thumping bass, and flashing lights, and all those shirtless men!
Describe your dream wedding.
Oh God, I’ve spent forever fantasizing about this. Probably in the courtyard of the Louvre Museum at night, candles everywhere standing in front of that glass pyramid, black and white roses scattered the ground. But my tux would be the star of the show. People don’t seem to understand that when you’re in a wheelchair you never get to be passionate about clothes, because half the time you can’t show them off! I’d want a three foot white silk train on the back of my coat draped down behind my chair in between the wheels and a matching fedora with a veil attached over my face. It’d be the most fabulous thing since J-Lo’s “The Dress.”
What non-LGBT issue are you most passionate about?
Without a doubt, disability acceptance in America. For the life of me, I cannot understand why disabled unemployment is at 75 percent, compared to the national average of 7.9 percent. … It feels like as a country, America is choosing to leave us behind. My parents fought to make sure I had a good education, and graduating from London in 2011, with my master’s degree, I felt like they did a great job. But the reality is, I’ve been unemployed for nearly two years, and while I’m waiting for the right opportunity, my disability makes employers believe I can’t work as a waiter, or in a grocery store or as a barista. And so I, like a lot of people, live off benefits, in an attempt to wait the economy out. And it’s not just me. This is the situation for lots of recent graduates with disabilities.
What historical outcome would you change?
I think I’d go back to the day Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. got shot and stop that. I honestly believe that a lot of the drama and the situations that Americans have been through since the end of Civil Rights (gangs, drugs, welfare, 9-11, education gaps, etc.) wouldn’t be half of what they are today.
What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime?
I think that would have to be when I sat in a room with Nikki Giovanni practically by myself and talked with her for half an hour. This woman embodies the last of everything my parents talk about in regards to American history, and she’s simply phenomenal in every way.
On what do you insist?
That there is no better food on earth than in the American Southeast.
What was your last Facebook post or Tweet?
Turducken is a deliciously grotesque mutation of God’s humblest creations.
If your life were a book, what would the title be?
“Life is Like a [Multifacted, Hypersensitive, Cracked, Racist, Overrated and Underappreciated] Box of Chocolates”
If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?
Read the fine print for the inevitably horrible side effects.
What do you believe in beyond the physical world?
Existence beyond emotions. An end to caring.
What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders?
Consider all of your audience, and not just the popular section.
What would you walk across hot coals for?
Love. Someone who sees me a whole person, not in sections.
What LGBT stereotype annoys you most?
The idea that all gay men are weak and feminine. I’ve dated some men who could rip phonebooks in half, as well as a 2008 Olympian.
What’s your favorite LGBT movie?
“To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar.” Noxzema is a chocolate goddess.
What’s the most overrated social custom?
Hugging. Being in a wheelchair, people are always so awkward about it. Either do it right, or don’t.
What trophy or prize do you most covet?
Probably my master’s degree from London. Considering what I had to do to get it, it definitely took the most work.
What do you wish you’d known at 18?
That I am not ugly or broken, and that not all men mean what they say.
Why Washington?
Two words: The Metro.
The LGBTQ+ Victory Fund National Champagne Brunch was held at Salamander Washington DC on Sunday, April 19. Gov. Andy Beshear (D-Ky.) was presented with the Allyship Award.
(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)



















The umbrella LGBTQ sports organization Team D.C. held its annual Night of Champions Gala at the Georgetown Marriott on Saturday, April 18. Team D.C. presented scholarships to local student athletes and presented awards to Adam Peck, Manuel Montelongo (a.k.a. Mari Con Carne), Dr. Sara Varghai, Dan Martin and the Centaur Motorcycle Club. Sean Bartel was posthumously honored with the Most Valuable Person Award.
(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)















Television
‘Big Mistakes’ an uneven – but worthy – comedic showcase
In the years since “Schitt’s Creek” wrapped up its six season Emmy-winning run, nostalgia for it has grown deep – especially since the still painfully recent loss of its iconic leading lady, Catherine O’Hara, whose sudden passing prompted a social media wave of clips and tributes featuring her fan-favorite performance as the deliciously daft Moira Rose. Revisiting so many favorite scenes and funny moments from the show naturally reminded us of just how much we loved it, even needed it during the time it was on the air; it also reminded us of how much we miss it, and how much it feels now like something we need more than ever.
That, perhaps more than anything else, is why the arrival of “Big Mistakes” – the new Netflix series starring, co-created and co-written by Dan Levy – felt so welcome. We knew it wouldn’t be the Roses, but it seemed cut from the same cloth, and it had David Rose (or at least someone who seemed a lot like him) in the middle of a comically dysfunctional family dynamic, complete with a mother who gets involved in town politics and a catty sibling rivalry with his sister, and still nebbish-ly uncomfortable in his own gay shoes. Only this time, instead of running a charmingly pretentious boutique, he’s the pastor of the local church, and instead of a collection of kooky small town neighbors to contend with, there are gangsters.
As it turns out, it really does feel cut from the same cloth, but the design is distinctly different. Set in a fictional New Jersey suburb, it centers on Nicky (Levy) and his sister Morgan (Taylor Ortega) – he openly gay with an adoring boyfriend (Jacob Gutierrez), yet still obsessive about keeping it all invisible to his congregation, and she drudging aimlessly through life as an underpaid schoolteacher after failing to achieve her New York dreams of show biz success – who inadvertently become enmeshed in a shady underworld when a gesture for their dead grandmother’s funeral goes horribly awry.
They’re surrounded by a crew of equally compromised characters. There’s their mother Linda (Laurie Metcalf), whose campaign to become the town’s mayor only intensifies her tendency to micromanage her children’s lives; Yusuf (Boran Kuzum), the Turkish-American mini-mart operator who pulls them into the criminal conspiracy yet is himself a victim of it; Max (Jack Innanen), Morgan’s live-in boyfriend, who pushes her for a deeper commitment and is willing to go to couples’ therapy to prove it; Annette, his mother (Elizabeth Perkins), who lends her society standing toward helping Linda’s campaign against a misogynistic opponent (Darren Goldstein); and Ivan (Mark Ivanir), the seemingly ruthless crime boss who enslaves the siblings into his network but may really be just another slave himself. It’s a well-fleshed out assortment of characters that helps our own loyalties shift and adapt, generating at least a degree of empathy – if not always sympathy – that keeps everyone from coming off as a merely “black-and-white” caricature of expectations and typecasting.
To be sure, it’s an entertaining binge-watch, full of distinctive characters – all inhabiting familiar, even stereotypical roles in the narrative – who are each given a degree of validation, both in writing and performance, as the show unspools its narrative. At the same time, it makes for a fairly bleak overall view of humanity, in which it’s difficult to place our loyalties with anyone without also embracing a kind of “dog eat dog” morality in which nobody is truly innocent – but nobody is completely to blame for their sins, anyway.
In this way, it’s a show that lets us off the hook in the sense that it places the idea of ethical guilt within a framework of relative evils, as it permits us to forgive our own trespasses by accepting its “lovably” amoral characters, each of whom has their own reasons and justifications for what they do. We relate, but we can’t quite shake the notion that, if all these people hadn’t been so caught up in their own personal dramas, none of them would have ended up in the compromised morality that they’re in.
However, it’s not some bleak morality play that Levy and crew undertake; rather, it’s more an egalitarian fantasy in which even “bad” choices feel justified by inevitability. Everybody’s motivations make enough sense to us that it’s hard to judge any of the characters for making the choices – however unwise – that they do. In a system where everyone is forced to compromise themselves in order to achieve whatever dream of self-fulfillment they may have, how can anybody really blame themselves for doing what they have to do to survive?
Of course, all things considered, this is more a relatable comedy than it is a morality play. As a comedy of errors, it all works well enough on its own without imposing an ideology on it, no matter how much we may be tempted to do so. Indeed, what is ultimately more to the point is how well this pseudo-cynical exercise in the normalization of corruption – for that is what it really about, in the end – succeeds in letting us all off the hook for our compromises.
In the end, of course, maybe all that analysis is too deep a dive for a show that feels, in the end, like it’s meant to be mostly for fun. Indeed, despite its focus on being dragged into the shady side of life, the arc of its messaging seems to be less about a moralistic urge toward making the “right” choice than it is a candid recognition that all of us are compromised from the outset, often by choices we only force upon ourselves, and that’s a refreshing enough bit of honesty that we can easily get on board.
It helps that the performances are on point, especially the loony and wide-eyed fanaticism of Metcalf – surely the MVP of any project in which she is involved – and the directly focused moral malleability of Ortega; Levy, of course, is Levy – a now-familiar persona that can exist within any milieu without further justification than its own queer relatability – and, in this case, at least, that’s both the icing on the cake and substance that defines it. That’s enough to make it an essential view for fans, queer or otherwise, of his distinctive “brand,” even if he – or the show itself – doesn’t quite satisfy in the way that “Schitt’s Creek” was able to do.
Seriously, though, how could it?

